Entertainment jokes
The man walks into a bar, reaches into his pocket, and pulls out a tiny piano and a tiny piano player. The piano player starts playing the piano. The guy next to him asks where he got that. The man says there is a genie out on the corner granting wishes.
So the man sitting next to him jumps up and runs outside. He says to the genie, "I want a million bucks." The genie snaps his fingers, and a million ducks appear in the road. The man comes back inside and says, "Hey, that genie is a little hard of hearing." The man says, "Well, did you really think I'd ask for a 12-inch pianist?"
What's an emo's least favorite game?
Cut the rope.
Wanna know something funny?
Me, because I'm funny looking.
Where did Stephen Hawking go when he wanted to get drunk? The Genius Bar.
I’m not funny! Please do not laugh at my jokes! But do check them out, they’re very unpredictable. Read them, do not laugh, they’re jokes, do not laugh at them!
Someone: hah- Me: NO DON’T YOU DARE!😠😠
Memes
What does a Hufflepuff wolf say? “I will huffle and puff, and blow your house down!”
That is related to Harry Potter 🧙🏼♂️.
What's God's favorite Michael Jackson song? The Earth Song. 😍😍😍
Yo momma so gay, she watched straight porn because gay porn was boring because she is gay!
Did you hear about the emo kid who auditioned for the school play?
He made the cut.
Why do cannibals not like to eat clowns?
Cause they taste funny!
What do you call a woman with magical abilities and an android? Wanda Maximoff and Vision! Or.... Scarlet Witch and Vision! This joke was added to celebrate and honour Marvel Studios' new series: WandaVision!
Why did ItsFunneh go on the road? She so Draco looking at a car then the car runs over him, sad Draco.
No one. Beyoncé said "To the left, to the left!" She really meant women have no rights.
Why the actual f
is there drama on this website? Anyone can fake to be someone they're not and no one will know the goddam difference. I’m just trying to look at/make jokes, and I’m getting shit from people saying, “It’s too offensive,” or something like that. Goddam, just take that shit somewhere else!
I have fun going on them roller coasters that go really high up and sitting by random people, and once we get to the high point, I look at the stranger and go "wham" and unplug their seat belt.
What do you call a magician with no magic? A dyslexic c**t.
What do you play Fallout 4 with low health?
You Fallout.
Wanna hear a joke?
YOUR MOM!
OHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
One time, me and the bois got drunk and we were on the freeway...
...when the road was closed because a wild animal species named “The Cult” was on the loose.
What did the doctor say to the terminally ill Power Ranger?
It's Morphine Time.