Employment jokes

I went to an interview and my future boss said, "Hi, my name is Watt Niseto, meet you."

Then said, "WHAT IS UR NAME?" He then said,

"What is not my name, Watt is." So I replied, "Ugh fine, I guess I'll call you Wha." Then he said, "Wha I not my name."

And then I said, "Ugh fine, my name is Will Knott." He then replied, "Hi Will Not."

Why do women need a pay rise? Isn't the glass ceiling high enough?

A gay man enters a bar. At the counter, he sees a skinhead sitting, which he somehow finds cute. He gathers all his courage, goes to the skinhead and whispers to him, "Do you want a blowjob?"

The skinhead punches the gay man in the face with his fist, causing him to go down. Then he drags him outside into the parking lot and kicks him again with his boots before going back inside and sitting down at the counter.

"Man," says the bartender, "but you beat him up quite a bit! What did the man even say to you that you were so freaked out?"

"I don't know," replies the skinhead, "something about a job..."

Do you know how I lost my music teacher job?

I tried to hit G by putting D.

Job sucks. XD

When I was at work, I saw this kid crying. I said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working in an orphanage.

Boss: You're fired.

Me: *turns in my gun and my badge*

Boss: You're a waiter. Where did you get those?

What type of work can orphans do? Homework.

So one day a boy was at his dad's work when another little boy ran in crying. Then the dad said, "Aw, little boy, are you lost? Where's your parents?" And the little boy at his dad's work said, "OMG! Dad, you can't say that!"

Why can't he say that?

Answer: He works at an orphanage.

I have some jokes about unemployed people, but none of them work.

Jobs,

50 shapes head.

What do you not want to do when it comes to giving an emo a job?

Showing them the ropes.

Where do mermaids get a job?

At the kelp wanted station.

It’s not rape if she’s a dead bear and I lost my job at the circus.

There was a kid crying. I asked him where his parents were. He cried more. I love working at an orphanage.

Why can't orphans work at SC Johnson?...

Because it's a FAMILY company.

Why did the dwarf get a job at Lidl?

Because every Lidl helps.

I got hired to work as a camp counselor for kids with ADHD, but I got fired. I guess I shouldn't have introduced myself with "Welcome to concentration camp".

I have many jokes about unemployed people, sadly none of them work.

I see that you start work at 9am, but your hairline starts at 9:15am.