Education jokes
Someone forgot to do half the questions in the history test.
And that's what made him go down in history.
My son was thrown out of school for letting a schoolgirl wank him off.
"That's the third school this year..." I said to my son, "... Maybe teaching isn't for you."
When the teacher dismissed the class to go home,
The orphan asked, "Where do I go?"
The teacher replied, "Home."
The orphan said, "Catch me on the streets then!"
How does a disabled kid walk to school?
He wishes he had the facilities to.
Q: What's yellow and can't swim?
A: A school bus full of children.
How does a peadophile help a kid with maths? He adds the bed, divides the clothes, and multiplies with the whole classroom.
Q: What do you call a skeleton that goes to school but doesn't do any work?
A: Lazy bones.
Why do Orphans like school?
Because they don't have a home to go back to afterwards.
I was given my electronics test today. Turns out it was given to me 'cause I have the same name as someone who got 54/59. I actually got my hopes up, too.
Thank you, anonymous user, for helping me with math a few months ago.
Now I got a 31 on the ACT.
Hi, father, I failed the class, you mommy!
Me: Dad, my phone is broken.
Dad: How?
Me: I clicked the home button, but I'm still at school.
Dad: Stupid.
What is a pedophile's favorite age range?
9-11.
Teacher: This assignment is big.
Student (male): I have something that's big.
Teacher: Yeah, your forehead.
Teacher: Why did the skeleton know the weather outside?
Student: 'Cause he could feel it in his bones.
Teacher: No, he read the weather report, you fucking idiot.
Me: I'm retarded.
Teacher: Why?
Me: It took me 2 hours to see "60 Minutes."
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They gave her a cheese grater and told her it was a book.
How do fish get to school?
By the octobus.
What time is it when you get home, can you walk walk home, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school, and walk walk home from school?
Hi.
This boy was in school one day when he became desperate to go to the bathroom.
So he asked the teacher, "May I use the bathroom?"
The teacher replied, "No, not unless you say your alphabet."
So the boy said "a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z."
When he finished, the teacher asked him, "Where's the p?"
The boy replied, "Half way down my leg..."