Everything is made in China... except for baby girls.
Economy Jokes
If the American Dream exists, why is it always filmed in Canada?
Mmmm, bread. I love Panera Bread.
This is unrelated, but where I live, there is no Panera Bread. Y'know what that's called?
No Panera Bread.
According to unofficial sources, a new simplified income-tax form consists of only four lines:
1. What was your income for the year?
2. What were your expenses?
3. How much have you left?
4. Send it in.
I can go to Walmart and scan my wrists. It'll say "antidepressants." ✨
Why was Hitler broke?
The gas prices are outrageous.
Most people call it grave robbing...
I prefer to call it cryptocurrency.
Let's take a look at the Swedish bench for today's game. $12.99 from Ikea.
It was so cold out today believe it or not, I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets!
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
We used to have Reagan, Jonny Cash, and Bob Hope. Now we have Biden, no cash, and no hope.
President Biden ordered an F16 missile attack to destroy the Chinese spy balloon.
Americans are thrilled. It's the first thing he's done to combat inflation.
What concert only costs 45 cents?
50 Cent featuring Nickelback.
Why are there no Walmarts in Palestine?
There are Targets everywhere.
Times are hard at the moment for people on disability benefits. I’ve got a friend who’s a dwarf...
...and he’s struggling to put food on the table.
What is illegal in Africa? Water guns.
A guy walks into a butcher's shop and says, "Sir, are you a gambling man?"
The butcher says, "Why yes, as a matter of fact, I am."
"Then I'll bet you $25 you can't reach up and touch that meat hanging over your head right there."
The butcher thinks for a moment and says, "I'm sorry, I won't take that bet."
The guy says, "But I thought you said you were a gambling man."
"I am. But the steaks are too high."
Yo mama's so poor, she can't even afford to pay attention.
What is the capital of Greece? -- About 10 dollars.
The American Dream is real. It's just set and filmed in Toronto and not Texas.