Q. Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
A. Because they hate the taste of their stupid clown wigs, makeup, and retarded shoes.
Jack and Jill went up a hill so Jack could eat her candy. But Jack got a shock and a mouth full of c*** because Jill's real name is Randy.
How are babies and watermelons similar?
They are both fun to smash open with a sledgehammer and eat the insides.
How are a mouse and a bale of hay alike?
The cat'll eat it (the cattle eat it).
"Knock knock!"
"Who's there?"
"Baby!"
"Baby who?"
"Do you want to eat this baby that I have prepared?"
"No thanks, I already ate."
What do you get when you eat a hamburger?
Mustard gas.
Jason Kenney has never worried about putting food on the table for his kids.
"Knuckle babies" don't eat.
How do you know if someone is anorexic? You toss them a onion ring and see if they eat it, or use it as a hula hoop.
Linda and Peter are having sex. Peter goes in and out hard then fast and then begins to taste her tits. Finally, he moves down to the vagina and eats her hard. His rouge is inside her body, lolling around. He fucks her hard again and his dick slicks up her vagina. The entire time she is moaning and begging for more.
When Linda cums on his penis she begins to lick his balls hard. Peter begins moaning too saying, "Linda, you're just as amazing at fucking as your sister."
I just busted a nut. A ginger nut.
Dad goat: Son, do you know what I like to eat?
Son goat: No, what?
Dad goat: Goat meat.
Son goat: *Gasps*
Dad goat: Nah, I'm just KIDing.
Why do cannibals not like to eat clowns?
Cause they taste funny!
What's the hardest part of eating bald pussy? Pulling the diapers back up when you're done!
once i ate a table... it was food consuming
What’s a cannibal's favorite food? Ramen (Ra-Men).
why did the cow eat?
Because it was hungry
Hey, watch me eat this African sandwich.
*Takes huge bite of air.*
My friend and I joined a french fry eating contest, but I just couldn't ketchup. So we switched to cheeseburgers, but I still couldn't mustard up the speed to lettuce win. I mayo not have thought this through.
So we switched to fruits, but when it got to the watermelons, I started to feel a little green. My friend couldn't seed the point of us continuing anymore. I just couldn't digest the stress, I guess! :D
Two drunk men spot a pig on some old farmer's land.
And they were real hungry (or so they said), and they both decided to take the pig with them into their car and eat it somewhere.
And so they did, and the farmer came out with a gun while they hurriedly drove off, and the farmer said, "Well goddammit, if it was a pig they wanted, why didn't they just take my wife?"
The other day I took my Grandma to one of those fish spas where the little fish eat your dead skin.
It was way cheaper than having her buried in the cemetery.
