If chickens wake up when the Rooster crows, then when do ducks wake?
At the quack of dawn.
Lol dick I'm the dick and duck
alec is bad at league? jokes, jarid is haha
really funny jokes at https://www.ranker.com/list/duck-jokes/jack-napier
The other day this duck came by the gas station he ask the cashier do you have any duck food here the cashier said hell naw I got no damn duck food this the gas station not no damn swamp and I ain't ya mama. Then the duck ask him two more times and then the cashier said for the last time no I don't have any duck food here for you ok if you ask me again i will put you in the oven and deep fried you like Kentucky fried chicken.
What's the difference between a duck? One of it's legs are both the same!
one day, a chicken went to the nail store. He asked the "owner" where the shampoo was. "BRO IM NOT THE FRIKKIN MANAGER" the guy said. So the duck walked away. The next day he went back to the store and asked a pregnant lady why she was so fat. The lady punched him and ran away. The duck cried. Then he went to the lady's husband and said that he must be tired of being married since she punches people every day. The man punched him. The duck assumed they were the punching couple. The duck walked, and then fell in a ditch and stayed there to die. The pregnant lady and her husband were very pleased >:) muhahahahahahaha
1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field. 2. Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a water-melon. 3. What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? “Put it on my bill.” 4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop. 5. What has a bed that you can’t sleep in? A river. 6. Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? She couldn’t control her pupils. 7. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An Envelope. 8. How does the ocean say hello? It waves. 9. What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match. 10. What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee. 11. Which U.S. state has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota (as in, “mini-soda”). 12. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted. 13. Apparently, you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff. 14. Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat. 15. Where do hamburgers go dancing? They go to the meat-ball. 16. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing. 17. Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless.
duck my sick
A kid is arrested for a school shooting threat he is then apprehended and asked why he wanted to do this. He responds with "what do you mean I already did it" then the police ran back to the school to aprehend the other people he was planing it with the cops busted in through the doors which caused a smoke trap to go off which then the cops saw three people walk in and the police begin to fire. But as the smoke began to clear the cops saw that the three people were 16 kids duck taped to rolling poles 4 per pole. Back to the station holding the kid being apprehended. the kid puts his feet up on a chair and said "Aww it pays to be lazy!"
How do you fuvk a duck? Usually duck a fuck
Why did the duck walk across the road I lost my pecker
why did the ducks go to jail
they sold quack
teahcer:what does a cow say. Susie:moo. teacher:good now what does a duck say. jimmy:the duck goes quack. teacher: now what does a pig say. little jonny: a pig says get up agaist the wall you black motherfucker
A guy walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says: If i can suprise you, i get a free drink. The bartender was unsure but agreed. The guy pulled up a 30cm long pianist out of his pocket and he starts to play The bartender was suprised and gave the guy a free drink The guy then sais: You see, i have a little wizard in my pocket that grants wishes, can i get another free drink if you get a free wish? The bartender agrees without hesitation The bartender wishes for a 1000 bucks, but he gets a 1000 ducks WTF! the man shouts. The guy answered: Did you think i wanted a 30cm long pianist
why did the qack go duck. idk rhydon deez. 4x2=8
Why did the duck cross over the cave? Because he wasn't a chicken.
IDK sorry...
A duck walks into a bar and says "Got any bread?" The bartender says "No bread here." And then the duck says "Got any bread?" And the bartender says "Didn't I just f***ing say that there was no bread here?" And the duck says "Got any bread?!" And the bartender says "You stupid duck! Or should I say d***? There's no bread here. Don't make me say that again, or I'll pin you to the wall with a nail." So the duck says "Got any nails?" And then the bartender looks surprised, and says "Of course I've got f***ing nails. Can't you see them?" And the duck says "Got any bread?" And the bartender throws the duck out of the bar.
Why can’t baby ducks lay eggs... cus there quacks too small
