Downing Jokes

Ok I put one penny down do you smell anything? :1 scent I put two penny's down do you see any fruit? :2 pairs I put three penny's down do you see and law enforcement? :3 coppers I put four penny's down do you see any cars? :4 Lincolns I put 5 penny's down do you see any pussies? : NOT FOR 5 CENTS YOU DONT

My mom and dad got home from a party pretty late. Why do I know? Because I was playing minecraft all night. Anyways, they get home and start fumbling up the stairs and being really loud. I could have swore I heard them fall down. I assumed they were drunk. I was just playing my switch when they come into my room. Now I'm about 10 at the time so I watch them get undressed IN MY FUCKING BED! I then just stare at them as they notice me before I witness anything. They say that they were doing "intense kissing" the next morning. I believe that at the time. But now I've been to health class. I now know the truth. I wish I hadn't

A man enters a bar with some friends, and they all sit down to a drink. After not too long, a man with glasses comes through the front door saying "Anyone who wants to fly off the third story balcony, come upstairs with me!" When no one listens, he shrugs, and everyone watches him go up the stairs. Ten seconds later, he comes back in through the door, again saying "Anyone who wants to fly off the third story balcony, come upstairs with me!" Everyone is amazed, and a few people leave to go fly with him. He keeps coming back into the bar, bringing more and more patrons to join him. The man at the bar is about to join in when the bartender finally sighs. "For the last time Superman, get out of my bar, you're drunk and the only person here that can fly!" The man with glasses frowns. "Where did all the others go, then?"

Man: I'm here for the job interview Employer: Oh good, good. Sit down. We don't get many people for the interviews. Man: Just anywhere? Employer: Yeah, make yourself comfortable. Jackson, right? Man: Yeah that's me. (Shakes hands and sits back down) Employer: So what makes you eligible for the job, Jackson? Man: Well, I'm really good at capturing the perfect shot and angle. it really takes dedication to do this type of job. Concentration and willpower, sir. Employer: I like you already, you're hired! Man: Wow thanks, sir. I know i won't do you wrong. I'll work hard for this job! Employer: You start now! Your first person is a man named John F Kennedy. Man: What? You want me to just take pictures of him during the parade? Employer: No. Man: This... This is a photography job right? Employer: No... this is a job employment for man hunting.

Q:What's black and white and red all over A: a nun falling down the stairs

If Bugs Bunny had Down Syndrome:

" Meeeehh, what's up Downs? "

A girl was going through some really bad health issues at her house. It got so bad that she had to be rushed to the hospital. Her husband found out about this after work and went to check on her. When he got there, the desk lady immediately pointed down the hall to a doctor. The guy walked up to the doctor, "Are you the one taking care of my wife?" The doctor glanced away from his papers, "Yes, that would be me. But I am afraid that she is in very bad condition. I have bad news and good news. The bad news is that she will have to be wheeled around in a wheel chair. Also, she can't eat normally. Taking care of her will become very hard. Basically ot will be like taking care of a big baby." Shocked, the guys says, "Wait, if that's the bad news, than what is the good news?" The doctor goes, "I'm just kidding with you, she died!"

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Why did the little girl flush her self down the toilet ?? ...<<<~~(((she wanted to join the Brownies)))~~>>>...

The school shotter when the cops show up be like:

Aint nothing gunna break my stride, aint nothing gunna hold me down. Oh oh. Ive got to keep on moving.

why was it wong to throw my chinese friend down the stairs

Friends are very important . I have lots of friends in very high places I hope the police can talk them down

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Hey guys, thank you for finding this. Vote in the thumbs up or thumbs down whether you prefer Reese’s cups or starbursts and comment if you have a different preference! I would like to know a little about people! Thanks, iz

As a lifelong farmer, I was excited that Ligue 1 was moving up the UEFA ranking toward an Industrial Revolution and I can finally leave the farm. Alas, Pessi joined and we went down a rank because he is so finished. Shame on you Pessi, now I have to go back to shoveling cow shit.