Downing jokes

Will Smith's slap was like 9/11. It came in unexpectedly and will go down in history.

I saw your mom at work the other night. She was talking about how good she was doing.

Hands down, best $20 blowjob ever.

What happens to emo kids when they go up?

They never come down.

Q: How do you turn a cat into a fish?

A: Tell the woman not to wash down there.

What do you call a cowboy with Down syndrome? A whipped potato.

My grandfather has been through a lot in his time. When he was in the war, he survived a mustard gas attack. And later down the line, he survived being pepper sprayed by the police. He was certainly a real seasoned veteran.

Life is like a game of poker, guys start by going with them clubs, ladies follow with a set of hearts, guys put down the diamonds, and before you know it you got a full house.

Two blondes fell down a hole.

One said, "It's dark in here, isn't it?"

The other replied, "I don't know; I can't see."

How many letters are in the English Alphabet?

Twenty-two. ET went home, P ran down his leg, and he took ME with him.

Stephen Hawking died due to the BIOS update. He shut down because the power cable got chewed.

I was walking down the streets with my parents and my sister. My mum said, "Step on a crack, break your mother's back." I stepped on a crack. My sister has been in the hospital ever since.

Kobe's favorite song was "It's going down for real."

My pathological cheater of a sister wanted to play a board game with me.

I turned her down because I didn't like the Risk involved.

I picked up a document, and I started to feel cold.

I looked down at the document, and it read "DRAFT."

Three women walk into a bar and start talking about how loose they are. One fits a sausage, another fits a cucumber, the third one slides down the barstool.

I was born yesterday, and I walked down memory lane. I fell over the edge!

Your maw *microsoft shutting down noise*

Why do you want me?

Cus u like me...

What do you mean?

You love me.

No.

Look down.

Stephen Hawking's death was completely accidental.

He pressed "shut down" instead of "sleep".

I got pranked so many times. Once I saw two wheels rolling down the street. I heard this noise. I looked behind me. There's a legless man in a wheelless chair screaming, "HELP! I CAN'T GO ANYWHERE!" but I walked away. I knew it was a prank.