Downing jokes

A man walks into an enchanted forest and tries to cut down a talking tree.

“You can’t cut me down,” the tree exclaims, “I’m a talking tree!” The man responds, “You may be a talking tree, but you will have dialogue.”

Will Smith's slap was like 9/11. It came in unexpectedly and will go down in history.

I hope you have to squeeze the hell out of toothpaste only for the little bit to fall down the sink drain.

What happens to emo kids when they go up?

They never come down.

My sister told me she liked Medusa.

I said, "Huh?"

My sister said my blow jobs are so good she looks up at the guy's facial expression, and when they look down, they do nothing but stay still.

Two magicians were in a competition. The first one did magic, and the second started counting down, "3, 2," but before he said the last number, he 1.

Life is like a game of poker, guys start by going with them clubs, ladies follow with a set of hearts, guys put down the diamonds, and before you know it you got a full house.

My grandfather has been through a lot in his time. When he was in the war, he survived a mustard gas attack. And later down the line, he survived being pepper sprayed by the police. He was certainly a real seasoned veteran.

My pathological cheater of a sister wanted to play a board game with me.

I turned her down because I didn't like the Risk involved.

Three women walk into a bar and start talking about how loose they are. One fits a sausage, another fits a cucumber, the third one slides down the barstool.

What do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stairs?

A condescending con descending.

I was born yesterday, and I walked down memory lane. I fell over the edge!

I got pranked so many times. Once I saw two wheels rolling down the street. I heard this noise. I looked behind me. There's a legless man in a wheelless chair screaming, "HELP! I CAN'T GO ANYWHERE!" but I walked away. I knew it was a prank.

Your hairline be going up and down like a Formula 1 car!

Sippin' on promethazine With lean, I fell in love.

I can't put down the cup. I can't put down the cup. I can't put down the cup. I can't put down the cup. I can't put down the cup. I can't put down the cup.

What do you get when you gobble down sweets?

Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, when she smiles at traffic, it slows down.

Did you know victims of 9/11 are fast readers?

They went down 100 stories in 4 seconds.

I would tell you a joke about 9/11, but it would come crashing down on you.

Joe Momma so fat when Santa came down the chimney he said, "Ho, ho, holy crap!"