Downing jokes
Why does a robot malfunction when they get sad?
Because they have a break down.
6 looks like someone facing up.
9 looks like someone facing down.
69 looks like 2 people sucking each other's dicks.
In 69, the 6 looks like someone facing up. The 9 looks like someone facing down.
69 looks like 2 people suck each other’s dick. That means, L7.
How do you make an apple turnover?
You push it down a hill.
One twin tower had a girlfriend. The other twin tower had the same girlfriend, so they both went down.
How can you get 3 homos to sit on one barstool?
Turn it upside down.
A girl in my class started barking, and I yelled out, "Furry!" Everyone started laughing at her, and I felt bad. After school, I asked to drive her home, and one the way there I apologized and then told her to count down from 10 - 1. Before she said one, I yelled, "THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!" then I jumped out the car.
A little girl walks into the bathroom and sees her mom naked taking a shower and asks, "Mommy, mommy, when am I gonna get breasts?" Mom says, "Oh, when you're 12 or 13." The little girl looks down and see’s her pubes and asks, "Mommy, mommy, when am I gonna get hair down there?" Mom says, "Oh, about the same time you get breasts."
Then the little girl walks in and sees her dad sitting on the bed with a hard on and asks, "Daddy, daddy, when am I gonna get one of those?" Dad says, "Soon as your mom leaves for work."
A Chinese boy never met his parents after they were killed in WW2, so when he learned where they were buried, he quickly rushed there.
He sat down in front of their graves and prayed, "I want to see your face again, mommy..." A miracle happened; his mother rose up from the graves and hugged him.
The boy cried then said, "I want to see you too, dad." He looked at his father's grave, but nothing happened.
Suddenly, a Japanese soldier came up behind him and asked, "Were you looking for me?"
How do you know if a chick is too fat?
If you pull her pants down, her ass is still in them.
What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?
Tell her to slow down and use lubricants.
What does a sex offender and Santa have in common?
They will come down your "chimney" tonight.
What would a Down syndrome Ben 10 alien be called?
Chromostone.
In a Catholic school cafeteria, a nun places a note in front of a pile of apples, "Only take one. God is watching." Further down the line is a pile of cookies. A little boy makes his own note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."
Have you heard about the canoe sale down the road? It was an ordeal.
Why did Stephen Hawking die? ... Because he pressed "shut down" instead of "sleep."
Me: DOCTOR! DOCTOR! I HAVE 50 SECONDS TO LIVE!
Doctor: Sit down for a minute.
A few days after her husband’s death, a widow accidentally receives an email from a man waiting for his wife in Spain.
The email reads: "Dearest Wife, just got checked in. Everything [is] prepared for your arrival tomorrow. P. S. It’s really hot down here!"
What do you call a bowling ball that falls from the sky and knocks down all the bowling pins?
An airstrike.
Your mama is so fat that when she sat down on the couch for a family picture, it was just her.