Downing jokes

What do a blackjack dealer and my uncle have in common?

They both hit me face down on the table.

A grasshopper walked into a bar and sat down at the counter.

The bartender looked at him and said, "We have a drink named after you." The grasshopper replied, "Who names a drink Steve?"

Two cunts were walking down the street.

One was doing calculus, and the other one says, "Imagine me, a stupid cunt that can talk...."

There was a man in a tower, and the other man thought it was a girl, so he said, "Let down your long hair." He said, "OK, I will let my big, super long, hairy penis down for you to climb and suck." Then the other man said, "If you have such a long dick, suck it yourself. See ya, b*tch."

Why do female parachutists have to wear tampons before they jump?

So they don't whistle on the way down!

Why do athletes cool down fast? Because they have fans.

Wash your hands.

What goes black, white, black, white, down a hill?

A fat nun.

My syndrome may be down, but my money be up 😈.

There was once a kid named Timmy. His father and mother went to bed one night and didn't hear or see Timmy come with them.

They all get under the covers. Timmy, still unnoticed, looks under the covers and lets out a blood-curdling scream. "MOMMY, WATCH OUT! THERE IS A SNAKE GOING INTO YOUR BIG BLACK HAIRY BUSH!" And he proceeds to say, "DON'T WORRY MOMMY, I'LL GET IT!" And he takes his father's penis in his mouth and chomps down.

Now I want you to think what their breakfast conversation was the next morning.

I was just sitting down when all of a sudden she screamed, "Help!"

What is Harry Potter's favorite way to get down a hill? Walking, JK Rowling.

Look, I didn't hit rock bottom. I gracefully floated down there like Mary Poppins with an umbrella.

Joe Momma so fat when Santa came down the chimney he said, "Ho, ho, holy crap!"

If you're ever down one day, just go to the orphanage and bully an orphan because what is he going to do about it? He has no parents.

I watch sexy girls AMV and my pp goes up and down and up.

Why couldn't the toilet paper roll down the road?

A woman walks onto the bus with her child. The driver says, "That's the ugliest child I have ever seen!" The woman sits down and tells her neighbor. The neighbor replies, "Go say something back. Here, I'll hold your monkey for you!"

Why go across the street when you can just go down the hall, lol?

Billy: "I'm so used to having you in bed with me, I don't know if I'm ready for this long-distance relationship."

Sally: "Ohh, don't worry brother, I'll just be right down the hall..."

Down syndrome kid: Stop being greedy with the Legos! Me: Stop being greedy with the chromosomes!