What does a perverted frog say? Rub it
Why don't witches wear underwear? To get a better grip on their broom
What do girls and rocks have in common? The flat ones get skipped
What is red and goes 200 mph? A baby in a blender
Little Johnny was sitting in class, and he was behind a girl called Sally. The teacher asks the class, "Who created the Earth?" And Little Johnny pokes Sally in the back with his sharpened pencil, and she jumps and says, "MY GOD!" And the teacher says, "Yes, Sally, God did create the Earth." Sally sits down. Then, the teacher asks, "Where do you go after you live a good life?" and Little Johnny pokes Sally again, and she jumps up and says, "HEAVENS TO BETSY!" And the teacher says, "Yes Sally. You will go to heaven after you live a good life." Sally sits down, knowing full well Little Johnny was poking her. Sally gave Little Johnny an angry glare, and she turns around. And then, the teacher asks the class, "What did Eve say to Adam after their 77th child?" and Little Johnny pokes Sally HARDER this time in the back, and Sally jumps, turns around and says, "If you stick that thing in me one more time, I swear I'm gonna lose it!" And the teacher faints.
When a miget smokes weed do they get high or medium
Why did the squirrel do the backstroke? He wanted to keep his nuts dry.
what do Michael Jackson and a playstation have in common? they both get turned on by kids
What do girls and rocks have in common
The flat ones get skipped
What do pedophiles and a SpongeBob intro have in common?
Are you ready kids?
What does the cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend?
He wipes his butt.
Little johnnys teacher asks him "Johnny ,do you pray before you eat?" little johnny says "I dont need to, my mum makes good food.
If Uranus is so gross, Why do they take HD photos of it?
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
How do you get a one armed man out of a tree?
You wave at him.
Today my stoner friend used my to-do list as a blunt wrap. -- He was high on my list of priorities.
What do you call those dead pieces of green stuff left in the bottom of a bowl of Caesar salad?
The last romaines. Now lettuce pray for them.
Jim’s car is swerving all over the road so a cop pulls him over, “Step out of the car” says the cop, “I am going to need you to take a breathalyzer test.” “I can’t”, Jim responds “You see I have very bad asthma, that can set off an attack.” “Alright,” says the cop, “then you’re going to have to take a blood test.” “Can’t do that either,” Jim responds, “I am a hemophiliac, if a wound is opened, I won’t stop bleeding, and I could bleed to death.” “Ok,” the cop answers “then I will need a urine sample.” “Sorry,” says Jim “I also have diabetes, that could push my sugar count really low.” “Fine, so just come on out, and walk a straight line for me.” “Can’t do that either” responds Jim. “Why not?” Demanded the exasperated cop. “Well, because I’m drunk!”
What do gay people and mice have in common?
They both hate pussy cats!
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
i feel bad for the people who died in 2001 those poor terrosists died doing their job.
What kind of tea do wealthy people own?
Proper-Tea.
What do you call a cow with a twitch? -- Beef jerky.
