DoS

DoS jokes

Abortion

How do you flatten curves?

With an abortion.

Viagra

What do you get when you mix Viagra with spinach?

Strong to the finish.

Orphan

Why does a kid never come home after a fight with their parents? Because they never found the key to the house again.

Women

How do women hold their liquor? By the ears.

Orphan

What do you call an orphan in a wheelchair running into fire? Hot Wheels.

When I was doing ju jitsu at my neighbor's cat, I accidentally created a whirlpool and then ate a mango mustard bar.

9/11

What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common?

There were two when we were kids, but now it’s a touchy subject.

Adult

How do you trick a camel jockey into drinking a bottle of watermelon schnapps?

Pour watermelon seeds into a bottle of watermelon schnapps.

Gay

How do you know you broke into a gay man’s house?

They only have a back door.

Chinese

How do you call a Chinese emo? Han ing. (Hanging)

Blind

How do you blind an Irish woman?

You put a bottle of Scotch in front of her.

Woman

Did you hear about the woman who broke up with the man who had a small penis?

When his friends ask how he’s doing, he said, “I wasn’t that into her.”

Common

What do noodles and women have in common? They both wiggle when you eat them.

Gay

How do you know you’re at a gay cookout? They’re putting your sausage between two buns.

Dishwasher

What should you do if the dishwasher breaks?

Kick her.