DoS jokes
Q: What do you call an orphan's family tree?
A: A stump.
A German, an Australian, and a Mexican are on a plane. They say that they can tell where they are by sticking their hands out of the pane.
The German sticks his hand out and says, "We are in Germany." The others ask, "How do you know?" The German says, "Because it's so cold."
Then the Australian sticks his hand out and says, "We are in Australia." The others ask, "How do you know?" He replies, "Because it's so warm."
Then the Mexican sticks his hand out and back in. He says, "We are in Mexico." The others ask, "How do you know?" He says, "Because my watch is gone."
What do you call a cow who plays an instrument? -- A moosician.
Why do orphans have water in their cereal?
Because their dad never came home with the milk.
What do you call a German lesbian?
A krautmuncher.
Memes
What do a prostitute and peanut butter have in common?
They both spread for bread.
How do you win an argument against an emo?
Kick the chair!
What do you call a group of depressed kids?
Suicide Squad!
What do you call it when you baptize a Mexican? Bean dip!
How do you stop a baby from crawling? Nail its hand to the floor.
⚠️I’m not racist it’s just a joke⚠️
What do you call four black ppl in a sleeping bag?
A Kit Kat
If a fly loses its wings, is it now a walk? Wait a minute, I found out a mind blower. So the 🌎 is the 3rd planet from the sun, doesn't that mean all countries are called the 3rd country of 🌎? If I get 10 likes, I'll do one mind-blowing fact daily.
A woman is on the edge of a bridge, about to commit suicide, when a strange man comes up to her.
"Tell me, why do you wish to end your life?" he asks in a booming but gentle voice.
"My children died last year in a car crash, I'm battling depression, my husband left me, and I lost my job," she sobs. "I don't wish to live anymore."
The man mulls this over, and proclaims, "I will solve all your problems, as I am a wizard and possess unfathomable abilities. However, you must grant me a blowjob first."
The delighted woman readily agrees, takes him below the bridge, and fulfills his request. After they're done, he asks, "How old are you?"
"37," she replies, wiping her mouth.
"You're 37 and you still believe in wizards?"
What do you call a porn star that always goes back for more?
Craven Morehead.
Customer: "Can I get this in a smaller size and a different color?"
Employee: "Ma'am, this is an adoption agency, you can't do that here!"
What do you call it when Panera Bread has bread?
Panera Bread.
Why do orphans hate dodgeball?
Because nobody misses them.
What do you call a white guy with a 10 inch cock?
Asleep. Because that motherfucker's dreaming.
Why do orphans play Sims?
Because they can make themselves a family.
What do you call a Chinese person with no legs?
Lim Ping.