Door

Door Jokes

So, I was going out the door and I see my dwarf neighbor at the bus stop. I ask if he needs a lift. He replies with "fu.. off." So, I zip up my backpack and keep going to work.

5 knock knock jokes from best to corny.

1. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Needle. Needle who? Needle little help getting in the door.

2. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Scold. Scold who? Scold outside, let me in!

3. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Mikey. Mikey who? Mikey isn't working, can you let me in?

4. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Says. Says who? Says me, that's who!

5. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Voodoo. Voodoo who? Voodoo you think you are, asking all these questions?

My bf: Knock knock.

Me: Who's there?

My bf: Ice cream.

Me: Ice cream who?

My bf: I scream if you don't let me see that smoking hot body!

A salesman rings the doorbell and Little Johnny answers. Salesman: “Can I see your dad?” Johnny: “No, he’s in the shower.” Salesman: “What about your mother? Can I see her?” Johnny: “Nope. She’s in the shower, too.” Salesman: “Do you think they’ll be out soon?” Johnny: “Doubt it. When my dad asked me for the Vaseline, I gave him super glue instead.”

What did the dog say when he got its tail caught in the door?

"It won't be long now..."

What did the window say to the door?

"What are you squeaking about? I'm the one with the panes!"

Get it?

What do you do when you get locked outside your house? You talk to the lock, because communication is key.

If Selena Gomez wasn't really single after Justin Bieber dumped her, I would wait for her to come by my house, take her fine ass in my room, close my door, and give her some sex medicine until she masturbates.

So, a guy is evading the draft. The cops bang on his door, and he runs out the back, through an alleyway onto a road. He finds a nun and asks if he can hide under her blouse. She complies, and the cops walk by and don't see them. The man comes back up from under the nun's blouse and says, "Hey man, you've got a pair of balls!" The nun says, "I didn't wanna be drafted either..."