Dont

Dont jokes

Bullshit

    • This is bullshit! Stop showing cheesy and dumb jokes! This website is for dark humor, insults, and morbid content! All of you who don’t talk about the following, go die!

  • 5

    • Sex

    • Can we have sex, because if we don't, I can't like you, big, thick booty!

    So let's have sex in bed, you sexy woman, or behind a tree, because shoving my dick in your pussy is a very nice feeling while sucking your ass.

  • 1

    • Text

    • The best way to tell someone that you don't like them is by texting them "370HSSV 0773H" and tell them to read it upside down.

    Dont memes

    Skin

    • I don't know why Trump has orange skin but has white around his eyes. So does that mean he is some fucking dog?

    Mom

    • Mom, shut up. Me? I don't shut up, I grow up. When I look at you, I throw up.

    Cow

    • What's the song that plays at the very end of the movie, Dr. Strangecow, during the montage of nuclear blasts?

    "Veal meat again, don't know where, don't know when..."

    Truck

    • Don't Touch My Truck-By: Breland and Sam Hunt

    You can drink my liquor. You can call my lady. You can take my money. You can smoke my blunt. Scuff these Jordans. You can say you hate me. You can call me crazy, but Don't touch my truck (skrrt, skrrt) Skrrt (yeah, yeah) Skrrt Don't touch my truck (brrp, yeah) Skrrt (woo-oh) Skrrt Don't touch my V8 engine with the windows tinted Boy, we came from the bottom, got it out the mud Whole block jumpin' 'cause the subs stay hittin'. If they roll up on me, know I keep one tucked (ooh, yeah) Woo Tell them boys come and get me. I be ridin' through the city. Young, rich and I'm pretty. Homie, don't get it twisted. Keep a semi in the hemi (oh) Red cup full of Henny. My hitters come in plenties, for real. You can drink my liquor. You can call my lady. You can take my money. You can smoke my blunt. Scuff these Jordans. You can say you hate me. You can call me crazy, but Don't touch my truck (skrrt, skrrt) Skrrt (yeah, yeah) Skrrt Don't touch my truck (brrp, yeah) Skrrt (woo-oh) Skrrt Don't touch my Wood grain dash with the matte black finish And it match my shawty with the big ol' butt. Know them boys soft 'cause they got hard feelings. You can try me if you wanna go and test your luck (woo) Tell them boys come and get me (get me) I be ridin' through the city. Young, rich and I'm pretty (yeah) Homie, don't get it twisted (yeah) Keep a semi in the hemi (in the hemi) Red cup full of Henny (yeah, we drinking) My hitters come in plenties, for real. You can drink my liquor. You can call my lady. You can take my money. You can smoke my blunt. Scuff these Jordans. You can say you hate me. You can call me crazy, but Don't touch my truck Skrrt Skrrt Don't touch my truck Skrrt Skrrt Don't touch my Woo, ooh, woo, ooh, woo, ooh Don't touch my truck (woo, ooh) Don't touch my truck

    Shed

    • A man (Ameenya Sheed) texts another man (Bob) and said,

    "Hi, I'm Ameenya Sheed."

    Bob: "You're not in my shed because I don't have one, but I have a garage. I don't think you're in there."

  • 0

    • Tack

    • I don't know why my blind kid is crying, but I think it could be the tacks I put on the couch.

    Parrot

    • One day there was a frantic call at the fire department:

    "Help me, help me! There is a cat meowing nearby. It is going to hurt me, it's going to kill me, can you help me, and send the fire squad right away?"

    "Take it easy, cats don’t hurt us, just relax and wait until he leaves."

    "You don’t understand it is going to bite me, it is going to kill me, it is going to be fatal!"

    "Cats aren’t venomous or in any other way dangerous, now who is calling?"

    "I’m Indy's parrot you twit! Now help me! Please help, please help!"

  • 0

    • Site

    • If you're reading this, then good, let's stop this hating on this site! We can just get along, or if not, then don't say anything at all! "Kiss."