Dont jokes

Why does the paper follow up with wine because it was junk? Do wrong, so wrong that you don’t even exist because nobody even eats it. Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Haha ha ha! Haha ha haha ha ha! Ha hah hah hah ha!

Guys, don’t suck your own dick, it does not feel like your dick is being sucked, it feels like you're sucking a dick.

Why can't orphans play catch?

Because they don't have parents to catch the ball.

Back in ancient Greece, there was a Greek Skyrim, but instead of FUS ROH DAH, the main character said, "Me damnit, Ganymede, get the #10 lightning bolt, I hate it when Helios lets his kids drive!"

If you don't get this, look up the story of Phaethon, and if you STILL don't get it, then you are dumb.

Son, what is 1 plus 1?

Dad, I don't know.

Son, it is 2.

Dad, oh, I was gonna say 2.

As a son, I was starting to do pranks. I told my mom’s boyfriend that she cheated on him and she doesn’t want to be with him anymore, and I told him that my mom said that he had a small penis. He left my mom, and she was mad at me. I thought it was funny.

Then I told my friend’s girlfriend that he cheated on her with another girl, and the girl told me that my friend had a small penis. He found out and wanted to confront me in my house. I wasn’t home. My friend told my mom what happened. Then my mom said the same thing happened to me. I came home one day, I saw my mom giving my friend a blow job. I asked what’s going on. My friend told me, "Your mom is my new girlfriend," and my mom said, "This is the penis of my dreams."

Did you hear the one about the deaf person?

Me: No.

That's because they can't hear, so they don't talk.

Why do nuns go around in pairs?

So one nun makes sure the other nun doesn't get none!

Tails: Hey, Sonic, do you need payback? Oh, you are not a fat hedgehog, you are a snail.

Sonic: But I'm a fat snail because Dr. Eggman turned me into a snail.

Tails: I don't trust you, fat snail.

My Mother: Wanna hear the song, "Chloe, your the one I want" on Pandora?

Me: No, I am tired of that song and I am annoyed by it.

Mom: Don't talk back to me like that, young lady.

Me: / someone else? - -gets silent in da room-

Brother: Yeah, this song is very annoying, but maybe better than the Chelsea song.

Joke is here now what do you do if you hear the name Chloe?

I didn't mean to call an Afghanistan hotline. I told them I was depressed, then they asked if I know how to drive a truck. I don't know how that has anything to do with it!

I hate it when people say to suck it up... I mean, sometimes I don’t want someone’s dick in my face.

When your sister asks you to entertain her, you don't!

Why are eagles 🦅 bald?

Because they don’t wear wigs.

Why can't orphans bake?

They don't have milk.

I've patched 1,000 roofs, and they don't call you Boris the roof patcher. I've built 100,000 swords and shields, and they don't call you Boris the blacksmith, but you fuck one goat!

Why can’t orphans eat at a family restaurant? Because they don’t have a mom or dad.

What’s the difference between a life and a nuclear bomb?

I don’t have a life.

Yesterday I saw an orphan walking down the street. I asked him if he was ok. He said no, so I asked him if he needed help. And he said yes, so I let him in my car and said, "Don't worry, you'll be home with your parents soon." He said my parents died. I said I know.

Why should you always wear rubber?

So you don’t leave DNA evidence.