Dont jokes

A Russian, a Brit, and a terrorist are in an air balloon.

First, the Russian says, "I dare to throw a stone down!" So he does that, but the others don't seem to be impressed. So the Brit says, "I dare to throw a brick down!" So again he does that, the Russian is impressed, but the terrorist laughs and says, "I dare to throw a bomb down!" So he does that and everybody can't believe what they have just seen. So a bit further, they land, and a shocked and afraid little boy comes running up to them. So they ask what happened, on which the little boy said, "I farted and my school exploded."

Like if you don't have a dad.

What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and a baby?

Both of their legs don't work.

If you hate America, I don't like you :)

Why can't orphans see their parents?

Because they don't have one!

When your wife gets pregnant and you don't want a kid, just come on down to Momma Mia's Pizzeria and abortion clinic!

Why don't stags buy drugs? Because they are too deer.

"You suck. I don't wanna be married anymore ://////"

To RANDYYYY,

Hi Randy, this is ALYA. I don't want to fight with you. If you're an orphan and you do know about your past, you probably get sad, right? Well, these jokes just bring up the bad times for me.

-ALYA with love

Can you guys comment on my nuts jokes (aka Willma, Bofa, and Savor)? I just want to see if people don't think it's funny.

A man walked into a bar with an AK-47 with a 50-round mag and yelled out, "Who the fuck fucked my wife?" Everyone was quiet.

One man at the back stood up and called, "Sorry mate, but I don't think you have enough bullets."

Why don't orphans have Life360?

Because parents won't track them.

Why do gay people get bad grades?

Because they don't get straight A's.

My money don't jiggle jiggle, it folds.

I want to see you wiggle wiggle, for sure.

Why don't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is.

Wife: I think these pants are getting too small for me!

Husband: Don't worry, maybe you are just bad at laundry.

What the difference between cats and dogs? They dont have one both taste good

Don't adopt people, or else your parents are gonna say you're ACTUALLY adopted, k thx. No jokes anymore, bye.

Why do guys hold their ball sack when they run?

Because they don't have titties.

Don't challenge Death to a pillow fight.

Unless you’re prepared for the reaper cushion.