Dont

Dont jokes

Road

    • Why did the telemarketer cross the road?

    I don't know.

    I don't know either, but I hope there was a car coming.

  • 1

    • Bathroom

    • Miss Drake, can I go to the bathroom? I need to piss.

    "Billy, we don't say piss. We say urinate. Do you understand?"

    "Yes, Miss Drake."

    "Very well. Now use the word urinate in a sentence."

    "Miss Drake, urinate, but if you had any tits you'd be a ten."

  • 0

    • Potato

    • Little Johnny was eating dinner with his family. His mother went around the table and asked, "Mark, what would you like to eat?" Mark said, "I'd like some fucking potatoes." *SMACK*! Mother slapped Mark. She then asked Suzie, "What would you like to eat?" "Well, I'd like some fucking potatoes," said Suzie. *SMAACK*! She slapped Suzie. "Okay, Johnny, what would you like to eat?" "Well.... I sure as hell don't want no fucking potatoes."

  • 12
    • Dont memes

    Song

    • I'm going to do a song that's called "Falling" by Trevor Daniel... so here it goes.

    My last made me feel like I would never try again But when I saw you, I felt something I never felt Come closer, I'll give you all my love If you treat me right, baby, I'll give you everything My last made me feel like I would never try again But when I saw you, I felt something I never felt Come closer, I'll give you all my love If you treat me right, baby, I'll give you everything Talk to me, I need to hear you need me like I need ya Fall for me, I wanna know you feel how I feel for you, love Before you, baby, I was numb, drowned out pain by pouring up Speeding fast on the run, never want to get caught up Now you the one that I'm calling Swore that I'd never fall again, don't think I'm just talking I think I might go all in, no exceptions, girl, I need ya Think I'm out of my mind, 'cause I can't get enough Only one that I give my time, 'cause I got eyes for ya Might make an exception for ya, 'cause I been feeling ya Think I might be out of my mind, I think that you're the one My last made me feel like I would never try again But when I saw you, I felt something I never felt Come closer, I'll give you all my love If you treat me right, baby, I'll give you everything My last made me feel like I would never try again But when I saw you, I felt something I never felt Come closer, I'll give you all my love If you treat me right, baby, I'll give you everything I'll never give my all again 'Cause I'm sick of falling down When I open up and give my trust They find a way to break it down Tear me up inside, and you break me down.

  • 3

    • Dad

    • Why do you let your dads sleep so they don't get grumpy and eat your dinner?

    Account

    • I wish I could follow you, though.

    But you need an account so I could follow you, but you don't have one. :'(

    Orphan

    • What does a kid say to an orphan, "Where are your parents?"\n\n"I don’t have parents. Where are yours? Are you an orphan like me? I hope not!"

    Daughter

    • So, I was f**king my daughter the other night, and I don’t know what was funnier: the looks on my wife’s face when she walked in on me or the fact that the abortion clinic let me keep her.

  • 0

    • Fridge

    • 20 fridges are loaded onto a plane, only 19 come off. Okay, moving on. You took too long.

    How many steps does it take to put an elephant into a fridge? (*Their reply* I don't know how many.)

    3, Open the fridge, put the elephant into the fridge, and close the door. How do you put a giraffe into the fridge? (*Their reply* 3...)

    Wrong. 4, Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the giraffe, and close the door. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A fridge fell on her.

  • 0

    • Water

    • How many oz of water does it take to screw a light bulb?

    None, also what the heck are you doing with water when people in Africa don’t have any?

  • 0