Dog jokes

What did the bounty hunter call his favorite dog?

His Boba Pet.

What is the difference between a human and a tree and a house? Is for dinner today after school today after I have school 🏫 I have for kids dinner 🍴 was that I had dinner 🍴 night night dinner 🍴 night is what time it when we went and get the dog 🐶 night and dinner 🍴 night I love 💕 it is the one ☝️ I did not have time today.

What did one dog say to another dog? I love you.

What do you get when you cross a rooster with a small dog?

What do you call a dog with no tail?

A tail-less dog.

What do you do with a dog that has no legs?

Take him for a drag.

Dad fucked Mom.

Mom fucked son.

Son fucked sister.

Sister fucked dog.

Dog fucked cat.

Cat fucked bird.

Bird fucked fish.

Fish fucked Dad.

Dad really liked it!

What is a Mexican's favorite type of dog?

A Chihuahua.

Black dog is gay.

How do you stop a school shooter from killing you?

Tell him you don’t believe in dog.

Did you adopt your dog?

Why do dogs lick their balls? Because they can.

A girl and dog get dropped off at an orphanage. Why was she crying before she went in? Because the people came back for their dog!

What da dog doin'?

A farmer had a donkey and a dog. One night, he was getting robbed by a thief. The donkey told the dog to bark, but the dog refused. So the donkey brayed very loudly, and the thief ran out of the house, and the farmer beat up the donkey.

What's the difference between a violinist and a dog?

The dog knows when to stop scratching.

Would you rather have a menstrual period with horrible cramps for 200 days straight (including men)?

Or eat 10 lbs of dog s**t every day for 100 days?

If your hot dog tastes like a piece of wood, who are you going to call?

"Ghost Musterd."

What is a Finnish Spitz's favorite comedian?

Redd Foxx.

How are infants and chocolate alike? They'll both kill your dog.