Dog jokes
What do you call a dog wearing a beret?
Smeargle!
Top ten dog breeds:
10. Dogs
9. Are
8. Beautiful
7. Animals
6. And
5. Judgement
3. Is
2. Cruel
1. Dachshund
First Man: My dog's got no nose.
Second Man: How does he smell?
First Man: Awful.
What do lady dogs (bitches) wear to work?
Pant suits.
What do you get when you are hungry? A dog to eat.
Memes
Is there anything worse than when it's raining cats and dogs? Yes, hailing taxis.
I know how to cut down on Medicare expenses.
Lock Alzheimer's patients in dog cages when they misbehave.
I think democracy is a scam. I love men and I love you. I love men and I love you. I love my dog. He won't sleep inside and I shitted my pants. I peed my pants. I smell bad. I took a shower and my dog was like, "Oh my god." I was like, "Oh." I was like, "Oh my god," and then I was like, "I shitted again" and he was like, "Bark bark," cause he's a dog. Thanks for listening.
How many retards does it take to change a lightbulb? None! They are still too busy trying to turn off the dark.
Click...uh Click..........,.UH!!
Confucius say, never try win head-butting contest with mongoloid: you’ll lose every time and only hurt yourself.
(mono gloid? mong a’ loid squeals)
Did you hear the one about the dog raised by retards?
All he’d do is go “Uh-f, uh-f....Ooohhhh!”
I put peanut butter on my asshole so the dog would lick it, but instead I got bit by ants.
What is the difference between a dog and a cat?
I don't know either.
Why do you think I asked you? ;)
I'm happy that I named my dog "I Know What You Did." It's funny to see how much people get scared when I call him.
I had to get my dog. Is it a tree? Was your time and I had fun today after dinner. I had...
A dog meets a cat. The cat is black and the dog is white. They have sex on site, no cap.
I hate it when I accidentally eat out my dog, lol.
Why does Donald Trump smell like dog shit? Cuz he's a dawg!
What do dogs eat? Dog food.
My dog died.
There was a doctor's room filled with 20 women, 4 kids, 15 men, and 1 dog. However, there were forty foreheads. How is this possible?
(They will think 44 heads, not 40 foreheads.)
Because there are 40 foreheads, not 44 heads.
So, one day I saw a dog outside, so I played with it. Then I was like, "I’m gonna see its name and where it lives." So I did. Then... its name was Momo. Then I looked to see where it lived. It said "Joe Momma Street."