Dog jokes
I left my dog at home once, and when I came home it was a mess. Let's just say I was in a RUFF situation.
This is a classic.
Why did the Dog go into the fire?
Because it wanted to be a hot Dog!
The 🦅 asked the female eagle, "What did you eat?"
"I ate New York hot dogs."
Why does Little Johnny hate hot dogs?
It reminds him of last night.
Dog.
A guy says to his dog, "Where are you?" The dog was actually dead, bro.
If you ever get chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire.
They're trained for that.
What do you call a dog wearing a beret?
Smeargle!
Top ten dog breeds:
10. Dogs
9. Are
8. Beautiful
7. Animals
6. And
5. Judgement
3. Is
2. Cruel
1. Dachshund
My dog got stuck in my ass, help!
What the difference between cats and dogs? They dont have one both taste good
Is there anything worse than when it's raining cats and dogs? Yes, hailing taxis.
What did Joe Biden say to the dog? I'm gonna molest you.
Why is a rap boat like a dog?
They both get off sniffing assholes.
What do lady dogs (bitches) wear to work?
Pant suits.
What do you get when you are hungry? A dog to eat.
First Man: My dog's got no nose.
Second Man: How does he smell?
First Man: Awful.
Why is Sonic so fat? He eats too many chili dogs.
Why does rapeboat like going to the dog shelter? It's cheaper than a whore house.
I think democracy is a scam. I love men and I love you. I love men and I love you. I love my dog. He won't sleep inside and I shitted my pants. I peed my pants. I smell bad. I took a shower and my dog was like, "Oh my god." I was like, "Oh." I was like, "Oh my god," and then I was like, "I shitted again" and he was like, "Bark bark," cause he's a dog. Thanks for listening.