Doesnt jokes
Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because he doesn't know where home is.
Why is prostitution illegal?
Because when it comes to screwing people and taking their money, the government doesn't want anyone outperforming them.
Little Brown Bear (LBB): Why did Santa take the kitty and all of my toys, Mummy?
His mom: Maybe because you're the second most massive shit stain besides Caillou.
*Krampus comes down the chimney to eat LBB*
Krampus: Should’ve been better, Little Bear.
LBB: Help, Mummy! He’s the Scratchy monster!
Shrek: Just kidding, it’s not Krampus, but indeed me and Black Donkey instead, and we’re going to poop on your floor.
Duggie: Hopefully Marvin doesn’t see us, and by the way, want some purplish Kool-Aid?
Q. What's the difference between pizza and an emo?
A. The pizza doesn't cut itself.
Just 'cause I have a big penis doesn't mean I can't have sex.
Just because she can't crawl doesn't mean she can't eat my balls.
Why do orphans always have the newest iPhone?
Because it doesn’t have a home button.
What's the difference between a gay man and a freezer?
A freezer doesn't scream when you put meat inside it.
What's the difference between a white woman and a tornado siren?
The tornado siren doesn't get raped.
What has eight legs and doesn’t rape children?
The Jackson 4.
My attitude doesn't have to be the only reason I yell and roll my eyes in the back of my head.
If Kamala Harris is Indian, why doesn’t she have that dot on her head?
So she claims to be.
And the only black color I know is when you shut off the lights.
My boyfriend always likes when I wear my fishnet sleeves. He says it looks great on me, but he doesn’t know that my skin is covered with scars... no one does. No one questions why I wear them everyday. I hope it stays like that because I can’t deal with my mom finding out that I still hurt myself.
Why can't a Muslim woman give head to an American cop?
She doesn't eat pigs.
Just because someone is white doesn't mean they are bad.
Sure, white Americans all treat Trump like a deity and are proud of their heritage of enslaving blacks.
But Canadians and Australians don't throw a hissy fit every time they see someone not white, and they don't think Europe is a country.
What’s the difference between video games and my dad?
My dad doesn’t beat me.
¡Hola, soy Dora!
Can you help me find the two fucks I'm supposed to give?!
Answering a knock at my door, I see a vacuum cleaner salesman who proceeds to tip a huge bucket of shit all over my carpet, before proclaiming any trace this hoover doesn't remove I will personally eat myself.
"Well, I hope you're hungry," I replied, "'cause they cut off my electric this morning!"
Google is a woman because it doesn’t let you finish a sentence before it makes suggestions.
POV: An Asian kidnapper kidnapped an Asian kid, and the kidnapper called the kid's mom. Then the mom said, "No, it's fine, my kid got a B, he failed." And the kidnapper let him go saying he doesn't need a failure.