Q. What sound does a sleeping T-Rex make?
A. A dino-snore.
DOE Jokes
What kind of shoes does a ninja wear? Sneakers.
Sara's Mom was helping her prepare for her driver's test.
Mom: "Okay, any questions?"
Sara: "Yes. I actually don't know what "yield" means."
Mom: "Don't worry, Hon. No one does."
What do James Doyle and Hannah Doyle have in common?
John fucked them both in the rear.
What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter?
An irrel-elephant ;)
What does Vin Diesel eat for dinner?
Survival Guilt.
What does the man cheeseburger say to the girl cheeseburger?
āYou got nice buns!ā
How does the author of Harry Potter get around?
She walks, JK, Rowling!
What does a news anchor cow say for the weekly broadcast?
"Here's the beef of the week!"
If a kid refused to go to bed, does that make them guilty of resisting a rest?
If certain diseases spread in water, why does Africa have them?
What does an armed bank robbery and Michael Jackson have in common?
Someone gets hurt.
What do the initials FEMA stand for?
Federal Erection Management Agency.
What did the priest say when he walked into an elementary school?
Let us prey.
Why does Japan not allow little boys to run?
Because the last time a little boy came, Japan lost a state.
Q: Why does Michael Jackson live in a Barbie world?
A: ā«He's made of plastic, it's fantastic!āŖ
People always often say to someone who are thinking about suicide that's the easy way out. Don't give up! All I say is I'm not giving up, just I'm giving in, and does it really seem like it's the easiest way out? I don't think so, it's probably the hardest if you ask me, or I would have done it already, but someone's got to do it.
What sound does a baby make when you put it in a blender? I donāt know. I was too busy wanking.
Teacher: What does a pig give you?
Little Johnny: Bacon.
Teacher: Good, what does the sheep give you?
Little Johnny: Wool.
Teacher: What does the fat cow give you?
Little Johnny: Homework and says, "Leave, motherfucker."
How many Americans does it take to fill the Grand Canyon?
4
