DOE jokes
What type of alphabet does an elf learn?
The elf-abet.
Q: Why does an orphan do badly at Baseball?
A: Because they can't find home.
What do an orphan's parents and the Predator have in common?
They are both invisible.
I gave an orphan an iPhone XR because it does not have a home button.
What day does Venus like?
SATURNday.
Memes
What does "bitch" mean?
Son asked father, father said it means "you're handsome." Son said, "OK, you're a bitch." Father: "Of course not, I'm not a bitch!"
Why does the owl 🦉 have a lot of friends?
Because he’s a hoot.
If I look after chickens, does that make me a chicken tender?
What do a Make-A-Wish kid and mosquitoes have in common?
They both got a 10% survival rate...
Random couple after their first night:
Husband: It was very tasty. 🥵
Wife: Aww, thanks.
Husband: Does anyone had taste it before?
Wife: ☠️
What does a Jewish man say when he sees a caricature of his face?
"We need to circumcise that one."
What does Cangaball do after eating its vegetables?
Go on eBay to see how much he can sell the wheelchair for.
How many people does it take to change a lightbulb underwater? The results are shocking!
What does a stick say when it falls down? "Wood you help me up?"
What is the difference between your new teacher and a train?
Your teacher says, "Spit out your gum," but a train says, "Choo Choo!"
Q. What sound does a sleeping T-Rex make?
A. A dino-snore.
What kind of shoes does a ninja wear? Sneakers.
Sara's Mom was helping her prepare for her driver's test.
Mom: "Okay, any questions?"
Sara: "Yes. I actually don't know what "yield" means."
Mom: "Don't worry, Hon. No one does."
What do James Doyle and Hannah Doyle have in common?
John fucked them both in the rear.
What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter?
An irrel-elephant ;)