DOE jokes
Little Johnny's mom got a call from school saying to come over. As she does, she is met by the principal. They go into his office and the principal says, "Your son is going to be suspended for a week for blowing clouds in the bathroom." The mother responds, "He is fifteen, how is he blowing clouds already? Bring him in here." A boy walks in, and Johnny's mother says, "This isn't my son, bring him in here, I would like a word with him." The principal replies, "Ma'am, this is Clouds." The mother faints.
How many women does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they can't change anything.
What does the A stand for in "orphan, adopt" from the orphan company?
What does Joe Biden say to young girls when he leaves the room?
"Smell ya later!"
Why does Joe Biden call women muffins?
'Cause muffins backwards is sniffum.
Memes
How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb? None, they can't change anything.
I am just kidding, you know gay jokes aren't funny, come on guys.
Why does Joe Biden like cold weather? Because heβs used to being in the teens.
What does a blind man and your dick have in common?
They both canβt get up without a dog.
1st daughter: Dad, I'm lesbian!
Dad: Oh, OK!
2nd daughter: I'm also lesbian.
Dad: WTF, does any 1 in this family love dicks?!?
Son: I do...
What does a bad friend give a blind kid for his birthday?
Give him a gun and tell him it's a hairdryer.
What do a deaf person and an orphan have in common? Neither of them can hear their parents.
Why does everyone respect midgets and dwarves?
They never look down on anyone.
What does a cannibal ask for when leaving a restaurant?
"Can I have a bodybag?"
What does a man have 3 of, which a girl only has 2 of?
Legs.
What kind of bath bomb does an Emo prefer?
A toaster.
When does the slowest person go as fast as a train?
When he is on the train.
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they just sit in the dark and cry.
Why does Joe only have 264 days in his calendar?
Because he can't celebrate Father's Day.
How many orphans does it take to repair a house? None, they don't have one.
Why does Saturn have a ring?
Because God liked it, so he put a ring on it.