DOE jokes
What does a sex offender that is a lesbian have in common with a sex offender that is a feminist?
They only performed cunnilingus on girls under 18 years old.
What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? “If we don’t get some support, people will think we’re nuts.”
"How does dry skin affect you at work?""You don’t have any elbow grease to put into it."
What does a Jewish man say when he sees a caricature of his face?
"We need to circumcise that one."
What does dark humor and a child with cancer have in common?
That it will never get old.
if i had 8 good women what does that mean
What does a dead baby look like?
I don't know, I close my eyes when I masturbate.
Why does the Norway navy have barcodes on the sides of their ships?
So when they return to port, they can Scandinavian.
Joke 1# "Knock, knock." Who's there? "Pastur." Pastur who? "Past ur bedtime."
Joke 2# Why does a slug always win a race? Because its components always stop for a break.
Joke 3# Your momma's so fat when she stepped on the scale it said, "I asked for your weight, not your phone number."
What does a zebra and I have in common?
We both have stripes.
What does an orphan do on school parents' day? Nothing.
Where does Kristen Stewart get her virginity from? She gets it from her mama and papa.
How long does it take for a depressed person to change a light bulb?
5 days. & I’m pretty proud of myself.
My boyfriend always likes when I wear my fishnet sleeves. He says it looks great on me, but he doesn’t know that my skin is covered with scars... no one does. No one questions why I wear them everyday. I hope it stays like that because I can’t deal with my mom finding out that I still hurt myself.
What does BLM stand for?
Bisexual Lives Matter.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they all beat the room for being black.
Does your shoe have a hole in it?
No.
Then how did you put your foot in it?
I come in from work to see my wife dead on the sofa. As I unzip for one last ride, she says, "BOO!" What kind of a dick fuck does that!
What does 2016 and 2020 have in common?
A monkey caused worldwide outrage.
How does a cannibal like his meat?
Human.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how big they are and how hard you throw them.