DOE jokes
What does a sponge do?
It talks to Patrick.
Why does Adam sleep early so his mum and stepdad can fuck on his bed?
Does your shoe have a hole in it?
No.
Then how did you put your foot in it?
What sound does a 747 make when it bounces?
Boeing boeing boeing.
I AM SFLUGO FOUNDER OF THE PRO ORPHAN JOKE CLUB. Just want to say that people spamming does nothing and we will keep making our jokes!! #SaveOrphanJokes and please say in the comments if you want to join the club.
What does NASA mean? No Apes Submit Astronauts.
Why does Michael Jackson do positions with kids in photos? Because they won’t do the same for him.
Taking you to go grocery shopping does have its perks... You get to scan their wrists for discounts!
If lint comes from pockets, where does a cockroach come from?
What does the A stand for in "orphan, adopt" from the orphan company?
If you are what you eat, does that mean all squirrels are nuts?
Why does Fallout look like Ohio?
A man is dating three women and has to choose which one he'll marry. He decides to give them a test. He gives each woman a present of $5000 and watches to see what she does with the money.
The first woman does a total make-over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits to look sexy for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much. The man was impressed.
The second woman goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much. Again, the man is impressed.
The third woman invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much. Obviously, the man was impressed.
The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money... Then he married the one with the biggest breasts.
How many Bay Street bankers does it take to change a light bulb?
In Toronto? One to hold it up and expect the entire country to revolve around them.
What does a chicken give you?
Student: Meat.
What does a pig give you?
Student: Bacon.
What does a fat cow give you?
Student: Homework.
Why does the queen move more than a king on the chessboard?
Because it looks like a kitchen floor.
What does NASA say when they don’t want to go in space: Never Access Space Again.
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they all sit in the dark and cry.
If someone has a hyperfixation with drawing and playing, does that mean they are on the "artism" spectrum?
What does a perverted frog say?
"Rubbit."