DOE jokes
What does a race track and your hairline have in common? They both go up and down.
What's the difference between God and Ron DeSantis?
God does not think he is Ron DeSantis.
What does a pedophile call an orphanage?
A supermarket.
Why does Darth Vader always choke people?
Because he wants them to feel what his Sith Lord does to him in bed.
What does Micheal Jackson and a rock have in common?
They are both hard.
My wife and I have decided that we do not want children.
If anybody does, please send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
What do Viagra and Disneyland have in common?
They both cause you to stand around for an hour waiting for a two-minute ride.
What does gum in my d*ck have in common?
Both get chewed on by little kids.
Why does Yoda like to get molested? Because he likes the Force.
Why does an orphan hate the ending of Finding Nemo?
Nemo goes back to his father.
What does a cannibal do after eating its vegetables?
Sells the wheelchair.
What does a depressed person and a chicken have in common? They both try to fly.
What does Michael say when he laughs? He he.
Why does it take so long for the pirates to learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years on C! Pirate: A, B, sea?
Why does Mexico not have an Olympic team?
Because all of them that can jump, swim, and run are already here.
Where does the resistor go after a long day?
It goes Ohm.
Why does a woodpecker have a beak?
So as to not smash his head against the tree.
What does a plug do when he's horny?
He jacks off!
What do tofu and a dildo have in common? They're both meat substitutes.
Why can black people post offensive jokes about making fun of white people, but white people can't post offensive jokes about making fun of black people? Because white people have white privilege. Does it cycle?