DOE jokes
What does Stephen Hawking have in common with a bull? They both charge.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
What does a rock and a girl have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
Teacher: What does the pig give us? Student: Bacon.
Teacher: Very good. How about the chicken? Student: Meat.
Teacher: Good, now what would a fat cow give you? Student: Homework.
So I was sitting on the couch with a woman, and I asked her, "Does this napkin smell like chloroform?"
What does Michael Jackson like about 28 year olds? There's 20 of them!
Q. How does a girl from Alabama know when her mom is on the rag?
A. She can taste it on her brother's cock.
Why does Helen Keller hate the national anthem? Oh, say, can you see?
What does my head and hell have in common?
They both have demons in them.
My son is so ungrateful. I bought him a trampoline and all he does is sit in his wheelchair and cry all day.
I would roast you, but your mirror does it every time you look into it.
How many black people does it take to start a protest? -1.
So, two condoms walk by a gay bar. What does one condom say to the other? "Hey, wanna get 'shit-faced?'"
Why does Peter Pan always fly? Because he Neverlands.
What does a cannibal call people in water?
Sea food.
YOOO, does anyone need an ark? I know a guy!
How many Karens does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one...to call 911 and demand a cop come do something about the intimidating blackness.
How much does a pirate pay for corn?
A buccaneer!
What does the SpongeBob intro and a pedo have in common?
Are you ready, kids?🤣
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable (A), beautiful (B), cute (C), delightful (D), elegant (E), fashionable (F), gorgeous (G), and hot (H)."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"