Why does Donald Trump take Xanax?
For Hispanic attacks!
What kind of chocolate does a lesbian hate?
Ones that contain nuts.
How many Karens does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one...to call 911 and demand a cop come do something about the intimidating blackness.
What story does an orphan always get kicked out of? Home Depot.
What does a light bulb and a school shooter have in common?
They both light up the room.
How many emos does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None they just sit in the dark and cry.
Why does the blonde stand in a corner when she's cold?
Because it's 90 degrees.
What does a pregnant teen and an aborted child have in common?
They both say, “My mom's gonna kill me!”
What does Bill say to Hillary after sex? -- "Honey, I'll be home in 20 minutes."
What does the SpongeBob intro and a pedo have in common?
Are you ready, kids?🤣
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they all beat the room for being black.
You take care of chickens. Does that make you a chicken tender?
Why does the ice cream have so many friends?
Because he’s cool.
How does a cow become invisible? -- Through camooflage.
Q. How many babies does it take to shingle a roof?
A. Depends how thin you slice them.
Why does Stephen Hawking do one-liners? Because he can't do stand-up.
Why does a heterosexual man swallow the sperm of another man after he has given him a brojob?
Because of the cream filling inside, just like the individually wrapped cakes of Hostess Twinkies.
So I'm banging the fuck out of this slutty chick, right?
And I'm thinking to myself, "She's PROBABLY got AIDS." So I go and get myself tested and, lo and behold, I'm positive.
This gets me thinking, "Where the fuck does an eight year old get AIDS?!"
"Who has my sister been hanging out with?!"
Police: Where do you live? Blonde: With my parents. Police: Where do your parents live? Blonde: With me. Police: Where do you all live? Blonde: Together. Police: Where is your house? Blonde: Next to my neighbor's house. Police: Where is your neighbor's house? Blonde: If I tell you, you won't believe me. Police: Tell me. Blonde: Next to my house.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they just arrest the lightbulb for being broke and beat the room for being black.
