DOE jokes
Why does Joe Biden call women muffins?
'Cause muffins backwards is sniffum.
How does a prostitute that has blond hair and polish and a gay white male kill erectile dysfunction for his clients?
He performs fellatio on them.
How can you light up a candle in a ship which does not contain any instrument and you are alone with just a packet of candles?
Answer: Just throw one candle in the sea; the boat will become lighter.
How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Q: What does a cat have that no other animal has?
A: Kittens.
Why does an orphan love baseball? Because their ball comes back, get pranked, bitch!
How many babies does it take to paint a barn red? Depends on how hard you throw them.
Hello.
Anyone does online dating and needs someone? HERE I am!
What time does the man go to the bank?
8 AM.
Why does the Democratic party want the Republican party to breed rabbits?
Because Democrats are tired of paying for raisins at the grocery store.
Why does Stephen Hawking only do one-liners?
Because he can’t do stand up.
Why does Sophia have no ears? Her mom gave her, her first haircut.
How does a rapper pay for his groceries?
With a SICK FLOW of cash!
I don't know why Trump has orange skin but has white around his eyes. So does that mean he is some fucking dog?
Where does the banana learn to split? At Sunday school.
"Among Us" is a game (Skeld) where there is an imposter trying to hijack the ship and kill everyone. Does this sound similar to September 11, 2001?
Why does America suck at Clash of Clans?
They already lost two towers.
Why does Adolf hate golf?
He ended up in the bunker.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Or at least it does if you throw it hard enough.
Why is it that if you donate a kidney, people love you? But if you donate five kidneys, they call the police.
My senior relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying things like, “You’ll be next!” They stopped once I started doing the same to them at funerals.
Me: How does this thing work?
ForTnite kid: Oh, you don’t know how to use a pistol? Look, I’ll show you.
ForTnitekid: *shoots foot*
Me: That wasn’t a very good demonstration.