DOE jokes
What is a dog that does not walk? A magic dog.
I was at a restaurant and a waitress yelled, "Does anyone know CPR?" I said, "I know the whole alphabet." Everyone laughed and laughed, well, everyone except one.
What does Santa say for the toys to go to bed?
"Time to hit the sack!"
Q: What does Abraham Lincoln have in common with a poor quality pirated movie?
A: They were both shot in a theater.
How many children does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw.
How many babies does it take to paint the walls red?
Depends how hard you throw them.
How does the dog dance?
He doesn't... he's dead.
What does a blowjob and a bonus check have in common?
Someone’s always willing to blow your bonus.
What does an evil hen lay?
Deviled eggs! 😈🥚
I tried to pull (his/her) leg at the comedy club, but got arrested for sexual harassment. Does that still count as a joke? 🤣
"Rosex, why you search that?" Does it mean "Roblox sex?" Kid, stop!
Where does a snowman keep his money?
In a snowbank.
What does a cow say when he remembers something?
"I have deja moo!"
What does Mammot like on a woman’s body?
Bum bum bummmm buuummmmm bummm.
A Thai woman ran into a wall. What does she break?
Her boner.
How does Stephen Hawking take a shit? He logs out.
What do you call a gay man that performs fellatio on a man and cunnilingus on a woman, a person who is curious about male bisexuality, a man that is bicurious?
Does it cycle now?
You wanna hear a joke?
Two Emos hanging out under a tree.
How many Emos does it take to commit suicide? Way too fucking many, because they never get it right the first time!
What does Sonic wear when he goes to the beach? A speedo.
What goes up and down and does not move?
Stairs.