DOE jokes
What does BLM stand for?
Biden loves millennials.
What does NASA mean? No Apes Submit Astronauts.
Why does a chicken cross the road?
To poop and pee in the potty!
I don't know why Trump has orange skin but has white around his eyes. So does that mean he is some fucking dog?
Who does Adolph Hitler call in an emergency?
Nein, nein, nein!
What does a Chinese machine gun sound like? "ching chong ching chong tang tang."
What does the ocean do to its friends?
It waves.
(*Sorry I wasn't making any jokes for a while, I was getting sick of this thing.*)
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw the baby.
Michael doesn’t fart. Jackson does.
What does a skeleton say when it has a lot of stuff?
"I have a skele-TON of stuff to do."
What does NASA stand for? Need Another Seven Astronauts.
Superman and Flash were in the living room pounding back a few beers. Flash says to Superman, "I bet you can fly into Wonder Woman's bedroom and get the best pussy of your life." So he does it. When he goes back to Flash, Superman says, "Man, that was great, but my ass kinda burns."
How many babies does it take to change a lightbulb? Well, obviously not 10; my basement's still dark.
How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two, but how they got in there's the real mystery!
What's the difference between a baby and a pizza?
One does not crow when you put it in an oven.
Why does an orphan not play baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
What does an orphan call a family photo?
A selfie.
My girlfriend is like Toys R Us.
She does not exist.
Stephen Hawking walking, oops, he does not do that anymore.
Q. How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A. Gotta be more than 9 'cause my basement is still dark.