Disease jokes

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Oh wait...

Friend: Your t-shirt is cringe.

Me: You should go get the Covid test because one of their symptoms is no taste.

What's the difference between me and cancer?

My dad did not beat cancer.

Yo mama so fat they faked COVID-19 just to put a mask on her.

Yo mama so dumb, she studied for a COVID test.

What's the best thing about stage 4 cancer... no stage 5.

What would be the most heartbreaking scene in a dementia film? I forgor 💀.

What's the difference between my dad cumming and cancer?

Nothing, they both stain.

I think I gave you the coronavirus because I can't stop staring, a-choo!

I got a great corona virus joke, but you wouldn’t get it.

I think we should change Alzheimer’s disease to Joe Biden disease.

Your momma's so fat that she should probably be worried about the increased risk of cardiovascular disease.

Stephen Hawking has enough money to stand up, but can’t grab the money.

Did you hear about the new Pixar movie? It's about cancer patients. It's called "Finding Kemo."

Corona be like:

Eliminating half the population of boomers faster than Thanos.

*snap*

What’s the worst thing about having a sister with cancer? You can’t pull on her hair.

I didn’t know if she was anorexic or not, so I tossed her an onion ring to see if she would eat it or use it as a hula hoop.

What's Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo? Head and Shoulders.

What's Technoblade's actual Zodiac Sign?

Cancer!

Cancer is so easy to beat. I'm already at stage four!