Disabled jokes
Hot women with big boobs work at Hooters, but where does a handicap woman work?
IHOP.
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs laying in a pile of leaves?
Russell
Dear disabled people, just go to the settings and enable it!
How are this joke and the kid with cancer alike?
It never gets old.
In my spare time I help blind children. -- I mean the verb, not the adjective.
What are the subtitles when a disabled person speaks in a movie?
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Today I was at PE, and I saw a kid in a wheelchair. I threw a basketball at him, and I yelled, "Rocket League!"
What do you call a blind and illiterate military leader?
Winston Churchill.
What is a victimless crime in the state of Michigan if you are an able-bodied man who is well-endowed, not white, and not a heterosexual male?
A white male who is heterosexual and physically disabled who is sodomized by an able-bodied and well-endowed gay male who is not white inside the men's locker room at the gym.
If Stephen Hawking was so fucking smart, why hasn't he learned to walk yet?
Three disabled guys (a blind man, an amputee, and a guy in a wheelchair) are flying back with the USA team from the Paralympic games in the Middle East when their plane crashes in the Sahara Desert. The three disabled guys (the only survivors) are now stranded and wait for someone to rescue them, but no one showed. They start to get real thirsty, so they decide to seek out water. The amputee leads the way, with the blind man pushing the guy in the wheelchair; and, eventually they find an oasis. The amputee leader goes into the water first, cools himself down, drinks a load of water, walks out the other side and lo and behold, he has a NEW LEG! He gets excited and encourages his friends to do the same.
The blind man offers to push the guy in the wheelchair, but he gets refused because the guy in the chair wants to be Mr. Independent and insists the blind man goes ahead first. So he goes into the water, cools himself down, drinks a load of water, walks out the other side and lo and behold, he can SEE! Now the guy in the wheelchair's getting really excited, starts pushing with all his might, goes into the water, cools himself down, drinks a load of water, and wheels out the other side. Lo and behold, NEW TIRES!!!
Man, this walk is really good. Oh wait, you can't.
A blind kid was talking to me because he was getting bullied...
I told him, "Just tell them what you see!"
Why is vegetable soup hard to cook? Because you can't fit the wheelchair in!
You guys should be ashamed of yourselves, making fun of the disabled. After all, they can't stand up for themselves.
Did you know Paul Walker had dandruff? Neither did I til I seen his Head and Shoulders on the dashboard.
Bro, I’m so pissed. There is always that one kid in the class who the teacher helps. I hate that guy in the wheelchair.
My handicapped friend was getting bullied. I said, "Just stand up for yourself!"
Why did God build a stairway to heaven?
So all the disabled people will have to go to hell.
My girlfriend broke up with me, so I took her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?