Disabled jokes
Why does Stephen Hawking do one-liners? Because he can't do stand-up.
A boy with Down Syndrome was talking with his mom.
“Mom, why did God make me like this?” he said.
“It’s because God made you special,” she said.
“Just kidding, I was only talking about your needs.”
My mum's a carrot.
I hate it when disabled people get bullied...
... because they can't stand up for themselves.
If Stephen Hawking was so fucking smart, why hasn't he learned to walk yet?
The translation is correct. Toilet for disabled person shouldn't be called toilet. It should be:
What’s better than winning a medal at the Paralympics?
Being able to walk.
What songs do people with no arms listen to?
None, 'cause they can’t press play.
What is a group of disabled people in a coma called?
A salad.
I bought my spoiled brother a trampoline for his birthday, but he decided to sit in his wheelchair like a little bitch.
What do you call a wheelchair user in a fire?
Hot Wheels.
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs laying in a pile of leaves?
Russell
What do you call a black person in a swimming pool?
Coco Pops.
What do you call a fat person in a wheelchair?
A broken wheelchair.
What’s a depressed kid’s favorite game? Hangman.
My friend told me to name a country in Africa.
So I said, "Hungry."
What do you call a nun on a wheelchair?
Virgin Mobile.
The wheelchair kid laughed at my test score, so I told him to stand up to the anthem.
What part of "Another One Bites the Dust" do you sing to a disabled person to make fun of them? "I'm standing on my own two feet."
I ran over three disabled kids.
"Cripple kill."
Hot women with big boobs work at Hooters, but where does a handicap woman work?
IHOP.