I hope there is a lift to heaven. I shouldn’t be making jokes though.
Disability Jokes
I saw a disabled person in the super market. They were at the vegetable aisle.
There was a blind man in WWE, and the commentator said, "Watch out! Watch... Oh, he can’t see." After he was sued for national offense.
How does a kid with no arms or legs like a video on YouTube when they say smash the like button?
They literally smash the like button "uuuuuugghghhhgBANG!"
I wonder if Stephen Hawking heard the song "Gangster's Paradise." Oh, shit, he can't!
Did you ever walk into Steve Hawking's house?
"No."
He hasn't too.
What’s the hardest thing to eat on a vegetable? The wheelchair.
Stephen Hawking had pins and needles and got told to walk it off.
It doesn’t make much sense why autistic kids run down the hall screaming racecar noises.
I mean, they aren’t in wheelchairs, so I don’t know why they do it.
What do you call a blind German?
A nat-zee.
What do you call a blind photographer? A waste of money.
What’s Helen Keller’s favorite game as a kid?
I spy.
Helen Keller once dated a brick wall.
I robbed a person in a wheelchair. He cried and said: "You can run, but you can't hide." I ran, and I never saw him again.
What do you call a crippled man? Alex keating hahahahahahahahahahahh!
When I saw a kid fall with no legs, I said, "Just walk it off!"
Bro, I’m so pissed. There is always that one kid in the class who the teacher helps. I hate that guy in the wheelchair.
I pushed a disabled kid down a busy road and yelled out, "Mario Kart!"
What do you call something that has 50 legs but can't walk? 25 disabled people!
How do you know when your vegetables are completely cooked?
The wheelchair rises to the top.
