Disability jokes
Helen Keller.
Have you ever walked into Helen Keller’s house?
She has.
What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and a refrigerator?
The fridge actually runs.
What do you call having a 69 with a guy in a wheelchair?
MEALS ON WHEELS :-)
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
I had to share a table recently with a disabled man. When I asked him for the salt and pepper, he had to make two trips.
Why did Steven Hawking go to hell, not heaven?
Because there is a stairway to heaven, but there is not one to hell.
Helen Keller walked into a bar, then a chair, then a table.
A man in a wheelchair and his friend were walking down the street.
Man in Wheelchair: *falls out of wheelchair*
Friend: Are you okay?
Man in Wheelchair: I can't feel my legs!
What do you call Helen Keller in a pitch black, sound proof room?
Redundant.
I spat on a blind kid and told him it was raining.
I stole a wheelchair from a disabled kid. What is he going to do, stand up?
What does a person that’s high and Helen Keller have in common?
Both stare off into space.
The real reason Stephen Hawking died is because he tried to overclock his wheelchair.
I hope there is a lift to heaven. I shouldn’t be making jokes though.
What does Helen Keller say when she touches a basketball?
Duhhuuughhhr.
I saw a disabled person in the super market. They were at the vegetable aisle.
How does a kid with no arms or legs like a video on YouTube when they say smash the like button?
They literally smash the like button "uuuuuugghghhhgBANG!"
I wonder if Stephen Hawking heard the song "Gangster's Paradise." Oh, shit, he can't!
Did you ever walk into Steve Hawking's house?
"No."
He hasn't too.