Disability jokes
I wonder if Stephen Hawking has ever watched Avengers: Endgame... Oh wait, he can't.
How does a blind person know they've wiped their ass enough?
How did Stephen Hawking die? Because he didn't charge his batteries.
What do you call an autistic My Little Pony?
Twilight Special.
I got my daughter a trampoline for her birthday. The ungrateful bitch just sat there in her wheelchair and cried.
People in wheelchairs need to stand up for themselves.
Why did Stephen Hawking go to Hell?
He couldn't get up the stairway to Heaven.
Why didn't they just switch him on and off again, or switch his batteries?
Did you hear the one about the deaf person?
Me: No.
That's because they can't hear, so they don't talk.
He dead, he alive, but most importantly, he got a new hard drive.
Q: Why does Helen Keller masturbate with only one hand?
A: She moans with the other.
What did Stephen Hawking's computer say when he died?
"ERROR"
What did John Cena say to the blind man? "YOU CAN'T SEE ME!"
When my girlfriend broke up with me, I took her wheelchair. I always knew she would come crawling back.
John saw a Gay in a wheelchair.
"I didn't know a man could be a fruit and a Vegetable!"
This joke does not work in print, you have to speak it to someone.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Helen Keller.
Helen Keller who?
(Don't say anything).
Helen Keller who?
...you will get a laugh...ty.
What do you call someone with one arm and no legs?
Names.
Where was Stephen Hawking during the house fire?
The top of the stairs.
A blind man once told me he smokes a lot because he has nothing to look forward to. Well, let's just say that I see his point.
What do you call having a 69 with a guy in a wheelchair?
MEALS ON WHEELS :-)