Disability jokes
What time is it when you cannot walk anymore? Time to get a wheelchair 🦽
Guy: Are you depression? 'Cause you're crippling me.
Car driver: No, I'm the guy that hit you with his car and crippled you.
Guy: Don't worry, I was already crippled because I got crippling depression.
When the school shooter is about to leave your classroom and the autistic kid's Sketchers light up.
How do you confuse Helen Keller? You rearrange the furniture and glue doorknobs to the walls.
What part of a vegetable is the hardest to eat?
The wheelchair.
Down Syndrome is already a joke.
Why did Stephen Hawking roll across the road? Because he had amyotrophic lateral sclerosis.
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair and said, "Hot Wheels!"
Why did Johnny not like the audiobook he got for his birthday?
Johnny was deaf.
Where was Stephen Hawking born?
Under a coconut tree.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special Forces.
Why did Bob fall off the swing while playing? Because he had no arms.
Knock, knock. Who's there?
Not Bob.
What do you call a blind German?
A nat-zee.
Stephen Hawking had pins and needles and got told to walk it off.
I got sent to the principal's office for telling the kid in the wheelchair to stand up for himself.
What do you call a cute boy with Down syndrome?
Awwtistic.
So Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.
I’m just kidding.
What has 50 legs but can't walk?
25 disabled children.
Times are hard at the moment for people on disability benefits. I’ve got a friend who’s a dwarf...
...and he’s struggling to put food on the table.
What's black and sitting in a chair? Steven Hawking after a house fire.