Disability jokes
The best news about a pretty girl with special needs is that you can get her to do exactly what you want her to do.
I mean, she probably thinks receiving oral is like 100% blood sausage coming right at her.
Trump should be grateful for DEI.
How else could a mentally handicapped person be elected President?
How come you never see a gay person in a wheelchair?
It’s hard to be a fruit, when you’re already a vegetable.
Why was Helen Keller so bad at driving?
Because she's a woman.
What do you call a man in a wheelchair with no legs?
Geo dude.
What is a victimless crime in the state of Michigan if you are an able-bodied man who is well-endowed, not white, and not a heterosexual male?
A white male who is heterosexual and physically disabled who is sodomized by an able-bodied and well-endowed gay male who is not white inside the men's locker room at the gym.
A: What did the podiatrist say to the double amputee?
Q: Sorry, but I can't help you.
What do you call someone in a wheelchair during a California fire?
A steamed vegetable.
Why should you put an autistic person in a refrigerator?
Because otherwise you’ll get a rotten vegetable.
(Not meant to be triggering).
What is the autistic woman’s favorite Dorito flavor?
Neurospicy.
What did the autistic man order at McDonald’s?
Ass Burgers.
Alright, class, we have 39 students and 40 seats.
That one dyslexic kid thinking he’s Superman:
What do slinkies and the handicapped have in common?
They are the most fun when pushed down a flight of stairs.
I'm starting a new charity where homosexuals help the extremely handicapped.
I'm calling it "Fruits and Vegetables".
What's the hardest thing when working with the severely mentally handicapped?
My dick.
What do you call a deaf and blind axe murderer?
Helen Killer.
Trying to find a good parking spot is a lot like trying to find a girlfriend.
If you can’t find one, you stick it in the disabled spot and hope nobody finds out.
Times are hard at the moment for people on disability benefits. I’ve got a friend who’s a dwarf...
...and he’s struggling to put food on the table.
I used to have confidence issues because of my learning disability.
Until someone told me I put the sexy in dyslexia.
What do you call a nun on a wheelchair?
Virgin Mobile.