What’s the difference between my dad and my step dad? My step dad beat my ass before he left

What’s the difference between a well-dressed man on a bicycle and a badly dressed man on a unicycle?

Attire.

what’s the difference between a pizza delivery guy and a cop.

pizza guys get punished for not doing their jobs properly

What’s the difference between hooker and a mosquito?

The mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.

What’s the difference between Issac Newton and the baby I just stabbed to death? Issac Newton dies a virgin.

What’s the difference between an ISIS training center and a school??

I don’t know, I just fly the drone

What’s the difference between America and a bottle of milk? – In 200 years the milk will have developed a culture.

A Blonde walks into a hospital claiming that everywhere she touches hurts. So she goes into the examination room and the doctor says “Okay I’d like you to point to wherever it hurts”. So the Blonde pokes her cheek and says “Here. Ow.” She then pokes her arm and says “Here. Ow.” She then repeats this with different parts of her body until the doctor finally says that she should stop. The doctor say “I know what’s happened to you.” “What’s happened to me??” The Blonde says, concerned. The doctor simply replies, “You have a broken finger.”

What is the difference between a baby and a watermelon?

One is a refreshing summertime snack the other one is a watermelon.

What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? – One is really heavy, and the other is a little lighter.

What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb You can unscrew a light bulg

What the difference between Rubik’s cube and a p....?

I don’t know but they both get harder the more you play with them

What is the difference between Light , and Hard ?? You can go to sleep with a Light on …

What’s the difference between a priest and a rabbi, the rabbi cuts it off the the priest sucks it off

whats the difference between Chris Brown and Santa.

Santa stops at 3 hoes

Guy 1:"Tell me a bad pun" Guy 2: "Alright What’s the difference between a tuna fish, a piano and a tube of glue" Guy 1: "Ok that last one was random as heck what is the difference" Guy 2: " you can tuna a piano, but you can’t piano a tuna" Guy 1: "Ok where does the glue come in" Guy 2: “Ah i knew you’d get stuck on that”

you might be

Whats the difference between a school bus and my Dad’s van?

Schools buses usually don’t have screaming and crying children

What’s The Difference Between A snowman and a Snow Women

Snow Balls

What is the difference between a washing machine and a child…?

The washing machine doesn’t cry when you put a load in it.

What’s the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?

You can’t hear an enzyme.