What’s the difference between Hitler and a feminist?

At least Hitler actually did something

What’s the difference between humans and bullets?

Humans miss John Lennon

What’s the difference between a gay guy and a microwave?

The microwave doesn’t brown the meat.

What’s the difference between Issac Newton and the baby I just stabbed to death? Issac Newton dies a virgin.

What’s the difference between a teacher and a train?

The teacher says, “Spit out your gum,” but a train says, “Chew chew!”

what’s the difference between a pizza delivery guy and a cop.

pizza guys get punished for not doing their jobs properly

What’s the difference between an orphan and a watermelon? One of them is fun to hit with a sledge hammer and the other one is just a watermelon

Whats The Difference Between A Rabi And A Priest One Cuts Them Off And One Sucks Them Off

What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde?the mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.

What’s the difference between 911 and a abortion?

With 911 there was a victim to tell the tale.

What’s the difference between you and Jesus? Your parents remember Jesus’s birth date

What’s the difference between a paycheck and your penis? You don’t have to beg your wife to blow up the paycheck…

Whats the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead hookers, i don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.

What is the difference between a coconut and your ex? One is fun to knock down by throwing rocks at the other one is a coconut.

Guy 1:"Tell me a bad pun" Guy 2: "Alright What’s the difference between a tuna fish, a piano and a tube of glue" Guy 1: "Ok that last one was random as heck what is the difference" Guy 2: " you can tuna a piano, but you can’t piano a tuna" Guy 1: "Ok where does the glue come in" Guy 2: “Ah i knew you’d get stuck on that”

you might be

“Why did Susie fall off the swing?” “Because she had no arms”

“Why could she get up off the ground?” “Because she had no friends”

“Knock knock” “Who’s there?” “Not Susie, she’s still on the ground”

“Where did Susie go when the bomb went off?” “Everywhere” “Why couldn’t Susie scratch her leg?” “Because it was in a different body bag”

“Why did Susie drop her ice cream?” “She was hit by a bus”

“Why did Susie fall off the swing?” “Someone threw a refrigerator at her”

whats the difference between my dad and cancer cancer dosent leave you

What’s the difference between your jokes and your penis? Nobody laughs at your jokes

Whats the difference batween an onion and a baby.

One makes you cry when you cut it up

what’s the difference between you and eggs? eggs get laid.

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