Difference jokes

What is the difference between a house and a car? A car can drive and a house can not drive.

Every time someone calls you a little different, car? Just say, "No, I'm not."

I love jokes!

What's the difference between a club and a bar?

I can only get dead hookers from the club alleyways.

What's the difference between you and me? You're not strangling a man with a cloak on.

What's the difference between dark humor and morbid humor? Dark humor would be saying, "ten babies in one trashcan." Morbid humor would be saying, "one baby in ten trashcans."

What's the difference between a UKIP voter and a shopping trolley?

Some shopping trolleys have minds of their own.

What's the difference between a Doberman Pinscher and a Social Worker?

Eventually, you can get a baby back from a Doberman Pinscher.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon?

One screams when you put it in a blender, and the other one is a cooperative little fruit.

What is the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus?

One is hairy and smells like fish, and the other is a walrus. You're welcome.

What is the difference between a flat tire bicycle and a woman?

Answer: You need to pump the tire on the bicycle before you ride it, while a woman you need to ride her and pump.

What's the difference between a bus full of children and a fish?

The fish can swim.

What's the difference between a battery and my wife? The battery has a positive side.

What's the difference between a white and a black fairytale? White begins with, "Once upon a time..." Black begins with, "Y'all motherf...s ain't gonna believe this sh.."

You know how we all have different sides? Well, I have a suicidal side. (Here a bang in the next room.) Oh well, not anymore :)

What is different about priests and acne?

Acne waits until you're 13 to cum on your face.

What's the difference between a water bottle and Africa?

One has water; the other one doesn’t.

What's the difference between Stephen and a car? A car loses oil, Stephen loses the ability to walk.

What’s the difference between Burger King and Ron Jeremy?

BK doesn’t sell real meat.

What's the difference between dark humor and morbid humor?

Dark humor is 10 babies in a trash can. Morbid humor is 1 baby in 10 trash cans.