A hobo couple is making out under a bridge.
The girlfriend goes: - Johnny, why is your dick so soft? - Flip me over, I’m trying to shit!
Dick Jokes
What does a blind man and your dick have in common?
They both can’t get up without a dog.
I like dicks... sporting goods.
Rape jokes are like your dad's dick. You don't want it but you still get it anyway.
How do I make my dick disappear?
I put it in your dad.
My girlfriend asked for a kiss, so I gave her my dick.
Why is Bill the bad guy?
Monica wanted to suck dick.
What do you call an Asian chick with dick in her ass, pushy and mouth?
Filipino.
How do you f**k a sheep?
Put your d**k in it and face it off the cliff edge. It'll keep going backwards as you push forwards.
Huh what you say?
Come fight me, suck a dick.
Why do squirrels love dick?
Because it produces nut.
If some girls are vegan, then why do they suck dick?
What's in a man's mouth when he realizes he's gay?
A dick.
How do you make a little girl cry for a second time?
By wiping her blood off your dick with her teddy bear.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
My I.
May I who?
May I put this pussy on your mouth?
Sex is like show and tell: you show your pussy and dick, and then you tell each other how you feel.
What's the difference between limbs of babies and a dick?
I've never sucked on dicks.
Please folks, you can hit the thumbs up button on the ones you like. There is no need to repost.
Anyways,
Knock knock Who's there? Can I come in? Can I come in who? Can I Come In You!?
More often than not, I will cry when I masturbate. Some nights I'm a real tear jerker!
But on the nights and I smoke a lil pot and then masturbate, my dad ends up bugging me because I am a weed wacker.
How do you keep a dog from humping your leg? Pick him up and suck his dick.
How does Popeye keep his manly part from rusting? He sticks it in Olive Oil.
Snow White and the seven dwarfs are in the the tub feeling "HAPPY". Happy got out now they are fucking "GRUMPY".
What's worse than waking up and finding a "Penis" drawn on your forehead? Finding out it was "Traced".
If I had a rooster and you had a donkey and your donkey ate my rooster what would you have? 3 feet of my cock up your ass.
Did you know Batman was actually Black? Yeah he couldn't go a night with out Robyn!
Did you hear Gods Word Of The Day? Its Legs! Now lets go out and spread them.
What do you call a Mexican woman with no legs? Cunt-sway-low
Whats worse than sucking 25 oysters out of your Grandmas Pussy? Realizing you only put in 15.
What wiggles and waggles?
A floppy dick!
Little Red Riding Hood says to the wolf: "What a big dick you have!"
Wolf: "The better to f*** you with!"
