Dick jokes
My dick harder than stone, man.
Kid: Why is Pluto a dwarf planet?
Kid 2: Why?
Kid: 'Cause it's as short as your dick.
Why did the polack try writing a letter with his dick?
Because he didn't have a pen to write with.
What can a gay man with a physical disability do better than a heterosexual woman that doesn't have a physical disability?
Suck a big cock.
I was on a website doing homework, and there was this funny a** commercial banner saying: "Eat a bag of Dick's!" It was the funniest sh*t ever!
I was blessed with a 9-inch dick. Fair to say that priest is in jail now.
Dick butt.
Why do they call my dick section 8?
Because all the hoes are on it.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I'm stroking my dick and thinking of you.
What's Moby Dick's dad's name? Papa Boner.
Little Johnny wanted a lolly, so his dada gave him dick.
Zion is so fat that his dick can't even fit in his wife's pussy.
BULLY vs. QUIET KID
Bully: I bet your dick is as small as a Tic Tac.
Quiet Kid: That's why your mom's breath smells so good.
QUIET KID WINS
1st daughter: Dad, I'm lesbian!
Dad: Oh, OK!
2nd daughter: I'm also lesbian.
Dad: WTF, does any 1 in this family love dicks?!?
Son: I do...
A girl did squats everyday with a 20 pound weight in her hand to finally text her boyfriend, "Show me your dick now!"
Dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik dik sub to enemy5spotted.
Hey, Squidward, say "kid" backward. Also, suck my dick!
What did the naked man say to the naked woman?
"Suck my dick."
Hell you fuck, bitch, dick!
A hobo couple is making out under a bridge.
The girlfriend goes: - Johnny, why is your dick so soft? - Flip me over, I’m trying to shit!