Do you want to know what gifts God gave me?
He didn't give me any.
I was made by the Devil.
The devil's number is 346 because you will be in jail.
Satan and the devil are alter egos.
Ever heard of a reverse exorcism? It’s when the Devil tells the priest to exit the child’s body.
Why did Jesus create the Devil?
He didn't recognize himself through the time portal.
What do you call a devil texting you? Travelers on the way. 😈🤣
A normal exorcism is getting a demon out of a person, but a reverse exorcism is the devil telling the priest to get out of the child.
My daughter has been writing letters asking Satan for gifts. Imagine my shock when I realized she has dyslexia.
If Satan is the devil, he's pretty sus.
Devil: Hey angel.
Angel: Hi devil, why are you nice?
Devil: What do angels add to their food to make it a little more spicy?
Angel: What?
Devil: Angelpinos!
God = what I hope to be.
Devil = what I can't accept.
I hope to be like Jesus, a dead martyr. I can't accept that my religion is evil.
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and the devil?
The devil always has horns... not just around children.
You are so ugly, when the devil saw you, he said, "Jesus Christ!"
I made a deal with Satan. I would get a free pass to hell if I serve as a demon lord. So, see you guys at the end of times!
What did the evil chicken lay? Deviled eggs! Get it guys? "Devil-ed" eggs! 😆
Chuck Norris once went to hell.
After that, the Devil only falls asleep after he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
What's the opposite of an exorcism?
When Satan has to tell the priest to come out of the child...
Lucifer's so broke he can't even afford air conditioning units.
A boy named Jimmy was riding to Hell to save his brothers and sister. That is the last place he pissed. There came across the Devil.
Part 1
What is Satan's way to go to places? A helicopter.
