Depression jokes

A depressed kid takes a drink of water and someone takes it and takes a drink. "Oh come on, the train stopped, the rope broke, I couldn't get on the building, the gun was empty, the knife was dull, the bridge was too low, and the cliff was nonexistent, and now you took the poison!"

My kids found me in the family tree. I was hanging there for hours.

My doctor prescribed a new drug to treat my depression.

It’s called Enditol.

I used to suffer from depression but through hard work, persistence, and never giving up..\n\nI now suffer from anxiety AND depression :\

My mom told me a joke she made 13 years ago, but she didn't tell me what it was... Anyways, I'm turning 14 next month.

Orphans are depressed, hahaha.

Are you my depression, because I’m falling for you?

Can emos eat a happy meal, or is it a depressed meal?

I was crying when Sasha died in AOT, I also got jealous.

What did the rope and the tree say to the kid?

Do you want to hang later?

What does a depressed person and a fashion enthusiast have in common?

They both have something hanging in their closet.

What's the depressed person's favorite song?

Van Halen - Jump

It's funny how you feel so alone with depression, and yet once you tell people on some random website, so many people relate. Unfortunately, it doesn't stop the loneliness.

Being alive is so expensive, I am not even having a good time doing it.

I saw this one quote: "The people who smile the most are covering the most pain." I think this is true, just not with everyone. As I am really depressed and act like myself with my friends, but with my parents and family, I force a smile so they don't worry more than they do.

I did a test for my therapy session to see what level of depression I had. It came back with severe, 22/24, but I asked her to tell my mum it came back as moderate, saying I would tell her that my depression got worse. She went along with it, but I haven't told my mum and I now make things sound like I aren't as messed up as I truly am to my therapist.

What's the difference between depression and your ex?

Depression fucks you harder.

I'm in the year 1930...

The Great Depression.

Bestfriend @3am: I love you.

Me: Love you too.

*wait whatttttttttttttttttttt*

I don't know if this is funny.

Christopher Walkin: "This is a literal universal remote! It actually controls your life! You can pause, you can rewi-"

Me: power button.

I once called a depressed guy [to ask] why he loves ropes so much, and he left HUNGing on the phone. (I'm not English, so I could've talked bad.)