Decor jokes
I wanna be a Christmas decoration cause they always do be hanging.
What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common? - Their balls are just for decoration.
Children are like a box of Christmas decorations. I keep them in my basement until it’s time to hang them from a tree.
Wacko Jacko bleached his skin, lit his head on fire, slept in a chamber, abused his pet monkey, built an amusement park in his own backyard, had toys as decor for his home, slept with little boys, raped little boys. Jacko was Florida Man before Florida Man.
Chuck Norris has a bear rug in his living room. It's not dead or anything, it's just too scared to move.
It's Christmas morning, and all the decorations are done, but the tree looks like it's missing something. *grabs the noose*
How can toilet paper decorate your house?
Shit sticks everywhere.
What does an emo do on Halloween? They hang like a decoration.
How to decorate a wall:
Strip off the paper and original plaster.
Put on fresh plaster and wallpaper.
Paint it (if you want).
Send a bill to North America and wait patiently for a reply.
Latias is red.
Latios is blue.
You should always remember to put up your curtains because I Pikachu.
I like my kids like I like my lamps.
Hung from the ceiling.
I complimented my neighbor's skeleton decoration for Halloween, but they just told me that it's their anorexic daughter.
To start off this Christmas season, I'ma make a list of what I want, then I'ma make plans with my family, then to start off my decorations, I'ma start with the first ornament and hang myself.
Yo mama is so ugly that her portraits hang themselves.
Why do women love wind chimes?
They vibrate.
What do Christmas decorations and dead people have in common?
They both hang from a tree!
FICTIONAL BOOKS / AUTHORS
Why Should I Walk? By Iona Carr.
What Lonely Girls Should Do By Seymour Fellowes.
Unusual Window Decorations By Rod Curtains.
The Long Walk Home By Misty Bus.
Race to the Outhouse By Willie Makit and Illustrated by Betty Wont.
I usually hang up Halloween decorations,
but this year I'm gonna be the decoration.
What is the best Christmas present ever? A broken drum! You just can't beat it!
What do you call an angry reindeer? RUDE-olph!
What is Santa's favorite breakfast? Snowflakes!
What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations? Tinsel-itis!
I love to decorate my room because it's a great way to express your heart, though I just remembered, my room is pretty black and empty...