Decor jokes
Why do Emos love Christmas? So they can pretend they're ornaments and hang themselves on trees. Hope you liked it, happy holidays!
Chuck Norris has a bear rug in his living room. It's not dead or anything, it's just too scared to move.
Children are like a box of Christmas decorations. I keep them in my basement until it’s time to hang them from a tree.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Terrier.
Terrier who?
Your Halloween decorations are terri-fying!
Leo must be an INTERIOR DECORATOR... because when she enters a room, it becomes UGLY.
I like my kids like I like my lamps. Hung from the ceiling.
FICTIONAL BOOKS / AUTHORS
Why Should I Walk? By Iona Carr.
What Lonely Girls Should Do By Seymour Fellowes.
Unusual Window Decorations By Rod Curtains.
The Long Walk Home By Misty Bus.
Race to the Outhouse By Willie Makit and Illustrated by Betty Wont.
I complimented my neighbor's skeleton decoration for Halloween, but they just told me that it's their anorexic daughter.
Latias is red.
Latios is blue.
You should always remember to put up your curtains because I Pikachu.
Wacko Jacko bleached his skin, lit his head on fire, slept in a chamber, abused his pet monkey, built an amusement park in his own backyard, had toys as decor for his home, slept with little boys, raped little boys. Jacko was Florida Man before Florida Man.
Snow everywhere, it's Christmas time. A person looks at the tree.
The person: "Only the last thing left to hang!"
He grabs a noose.
I wanna be a Christmas decoration cause they always do be hanging.
Community talk
A man had just finished drinking at the pub yk how it goes walking besides the train tracks AND THIS WAS A SMALL VILLAGE SO NOT MUCH HAPPENED When suddenly he saw a random silver case on the side in the grass near the train tracks NOW PEOPLE HAD BEEN SEEING THIS SUIT CASE FOR A FEW WEEKS NOW but no one did anything or opened it because what if a man left it yk? cant go through someones stuff But the mans curiosity go… Read more
I usually hang up halloween decorations,
but this year imma be the decoration.
Halloween is my favorite time of year because I can kidnap and mutilate those bloody children right off the streets and nobody will bat an eye. They'll just talk about what a funny stunt it was or tell me how impressive my "realistic" decoration is They'll never know the truth