Death jokes
A leaf and an emo kid fall from a tree. Which one is gonna land first?
The leaf, because the rope stops the emo kid.
Friend 1: Did you?
Depressed friend 2: I didn't!
Friend one: Swear on your life!
Depressed friend 2: I swear.
A week later friend 2 dropped dead to their utter delight.
What does Buzz Lightyear and an orphan's parents have in common?
They go to infinity and beyond.
What did Michael Jackson say before he died, as far as his childhood? "This is it."
If you killed an orphan's family... oh wait!
What falls to the ground first if an apple and an emo kid fall from a tree?
The apple because the rope caught the emo kid.
My mom said the only way to cure depression is to do what she does. She's dead.
After a suicide joke say, "Don't leave me hanging, or I'll cut it out."
My grandfather said that ppl rely on technology too much these days, so I thought about what he said and decided to unplug his life support.
Welcome to Morgan's Morgue and Pizzeria where yesterday's loss is today's sauce!
Why did no one turn up to John's funeral?
Because Sally wrote the invitations!
I was crying at school because my grandpa died. My friends asked what his last words were. I told them his last words were, "Are you still holding the ladder?"
John F. Kennedy may rest in pieces.
What did the gay necrophiliac say when his relationship ended?
"That rotten asshole split on me again!"
I told some orphan that you can see your family, but I meant Spider-Man: Homecoming...
If you can't see your family... you're an orphan.
How did the rape victim on a diet lose 21 grams?
She died.
How do you help a rape victim on a diet lose 7 pounds?
Kill her afterwards.
What's yellow and can't swim? A school bus full of orphans.
A leaf and an emo fell off a cliff, who landed first? The leaf, because the rope stopped the emo.