This category is messed up.
My Mom died in 9/11, at least she was doing what she loved, flying planes.
My great uncle died in a concentration camp.
He fell off one of the guard towers.
Me: Good night, everyone.
My friends and family: Night.
Me: *gets in coffin*
My family: *stares at my friends* You aren't going to do something?!?
My friends: *to my family* Nope, this is normal.
One day my friend said: "I want tacos from Katie's, you?" and I said no thanks and she left. I never saw her again. Today I remember that I saw her name on TV as one of the victims of suicide, then I remember her and my motto: "If I'm dying, you're dying with me, you got no choice." I NEVER ate tacos from Katie's again.
Michael Jackson died of shock when he found out Boys II Men wasn't a delivery service.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett? Six hours.
At weddings my mom always tells me I’m next. So I say the same to her, at funerals.
What do you call an orphan you put into a volcano with a wheelchair?
Hot Wheels.
One of my friends got a haircut, and everyone giggled and bullied him... I didn’t, I died of laughter 😂
The flag at NAMBLA headquarters is flying at half mast.
What would you like as your last meal?
Fried chicken. Extra crispy.
When's the best day to get the chair? Fry-day.
Hitler killed 18 million and only died once.
Fucking camper!
What do you call a bunch of Paki's jumping off a cliff?
Chocolate drops.
Why did he die? He forgot to get a new GPU for his new PC.
Bro, Kobe Bryant is singing with the basketball team in his helicopter, celebrating right now, I bet.
Oh wait, I forgot.
Michael Jackson went into an Italian restaurant and died because he choked on 9-year-old meatballs.
If you drop an apple and an emo girl, who falls first?
The apple, because the emo girl hung herself.
Someone went up to an orphan and asked him why he was talking to the air. He said he was talking to his mom.
If just Africa had more mosquito nets, millions of innocent mosquitos could be saved from a horrible death of AIDS
