Dead jokes
My name is Gunter.
Gunter Gunter is dead.
Gunter Gunter stuffed my cat's head. ;D
How do skeletons make love?
They bone each other!
What is the difference between onions and my dead grandma?
I cried when I cut up the onions.
Teacher: What do you kids want to be when you grow up?
Kid 1: I want to be a firefighter.
Kid 2: I want to be a police officer.
Kid 3: I want to be dead like both my parents.
Teacher: Ok, everyone pull out your books.
Kid 4: Are we going to ignore what he said?
Teacher: What do you want me to do? Call his parents?
Why can't dinosaurs clap? Because they're dead!
Memes
I FAMOUS NOW GUYS
What's black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white...? A dead nun rolling down a hill.
Anonymous 1: Why are you crying?
Anonymous 2: No, buddy, come to my finral.
I didn't steal it. 🌚
X: Morning, sunshine!
Y: Oh, yeah. 30 minutes more.
What's the difference between a dump truck of dead babies and a Ferrari?
I don't own a Ferrari.
Q: How do you make a fire?
A: Oil and dead babies.
After I am dead during my funeral service, I want someone to play my favorite song by Boy George and Culture Club, "Church of the Poison Mind."
Me: Hey, wanna know my spirit animal?
Friend: Sure.
Me: Roadkill, because I can see my mom pretty clearly now.
Friend: Wait, aren't you dead?
Me: Aren't you my son?
Friend: So that's what Mom was trying to hide from me.
How many dead babies does it take to clean my refrigerator?.....it gotta be more than 4 because the fridge is still dirty.
What’s better than swinging a dead baby in circles over your head with a 5 foot rope?
Stopping it with a shovel.
When you have a box of dead babies in your garage and one of them is alive at the bottom and has to eat its way out but goes back for seconds.
Boy: I'm dead.
Girl: Is that why you're so ugly?
Boy: No, I was just born this way.
I gave a deaf kid AirPods.
Emo chick: "I wish I could feel dead inside!"
The kid named Dead: "😄😄😄"
A kid came to the orphanage with a dead fish. She was crying.
Why was the kid crying in the orphanage? Because someone came for the fish.
I dumped the dead, disabled person's body into a dumpster full of rats.