Dead jokes
Okay, long story fast, I walked to GameStop in my house, in the kitchen, by Walmart, to a BTS Squid Game concert, and Drake and Pablo were there for her labor in the Cowboys stadium by Nike, so I bought a pencil from a dead alive man. He said "ZOO WEE MAMA." So yeah.
I fed a vegan cock. No, not chicken, no, not my cock, my dead dad's.
My gardener found a dead body. Of the old gardener!
How do you find out if your kid is gay?
Lock him in a closet and if he comes out, he's gay. If not, he's dead straight.
What has two legs, two arms, one dead and covered in red?
My ex-wife.
Twinkle, twinkle, there’s a car Coming like a shooting star.
I will stand in the way. I will not be seen again. Are you happy I am dead? Now you made it to the end.
What do you call a dolphin in the woods? Dead.
Why would you shoot up an innocent school... if your aimbot's dead and you can't commit headshots only?
What do you call a group of Emo kids?
Suicide Squad.
What jumps and never let's go?
An Emo kid.
I bet all Emos want to be like their biggest influencers some day.
Dead.
Why do Emos want to be the "Scene" these days?
The only thing I've "Scene" from them is their suicide rate climbing, it's starting to climb quicker than they did to get to the top of whatever they jumped off.
Therapist: What do you want to do when you grow up?
Me: Oh, I wan-
Therapist: Don’t say to be dead.
Me: Well, I want to be an entrepreneur. I want to sell land, pencils, oh yeah. I also want to sell farm.
So.. err actually, don’t worry. I was gonna make a joke about dead babies, but I had to abort.
Knock, knock.
Who is there?
Your Nan.
WHAT? MY NAN IS DEAD!
What do you call a dead hooker?
It doesn't matter, she won't answer you.
I can tell a joke :)
Twinkle, twinkle, there's a car Coming like a shooting star. I will stand in the way. I will not be seen again. Are you happy I am dead? Now you made it to the end.
Some guy came to me and said, "I'm your dad's friend. He asked me to pick you up."
*Laughing freaking hard* and told him, "Did you dig the grave?"
I got arrested for raping a girl. Its so unfair, i really thought she was dead.
When I get home from school, I always lay on my floor crying and wishing I was dead.
Twin Tower jokes are funny because they are dead.
What is the difference between Madeleine McCann and a submarine?
They are both full of seamen and are at the bottom of the ocean.
What is an orange cucumber?
A carrot, duh!