Day jokes

Kiss a girl on the forehead make her happy for a day.

If you give her anal you'll make her whole weak.

I never knew what my dad's job was.

One day, at school, I got a scam phone call, later, I got another, and another. I finally had enough and answered the phone, but to make an impact I said "Hello?"

My dad answered...

I had the WORST day ever. My ex was sent to the hospital from a gun, and I got my hunting license removed.

Whoever is reading this, I hope you have a good day because I feel bad you're so short.

What did one plane say to the other?

"It’s been a long day, I’m ready to crash."

Other plane: "No you’re not, we haven’t even gotten high yet!"

One day, I sit in the lounge on a chair.

I dropped my phone the other day when a guy picked up my phone and started to put it in his pocket.

I said, "Hey, that's my phone," and he said, "First of all, my name isn't 'Hey', it's Jay. Second of all, it's an iPhone, not a 'myPhone'. Get it right."

Seven days without a pun makes one weak.

Why is the day you do laundry, cook, clean, iron, and so on called a day off?

Roses are red. Violets are blue. If he's busy on Valentine's Day, the side chick is you.

Hi, how are you? Busy, busy today and tomorrow. I have to go home from home and walk home. Walk and a bike. Walk, walk, and a bike to school tomorrow night. I have to have lunch with my mom and dad, and I have dinner with you tonight.

What is the difference between snow boots on Earth Day, today, after dinner, and walking home?

At night time, in Africa, it's known as the darkest country. Till this day, I still wonder why.

Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.

Some moving men had just begun their day's work.

The first thing they brought into the house was a huge couch.

The owner came in and asked how everything was going. They replied, "Sofa so good."

What time is it? It's time for lunch.

*Quoted by Bubble Guppies*

I did a walk today and had fun. Today, I did not have to go get my kids and get to my new house. 🏠 It was a good day. I had fun. I did a walk today. I had fun today, but I’m going to be at the car 🚘 when I’m at my car. 🚘 What time was your night time? What time did [you go to bed]?

What school did we say it was today? What did the snow say? "I love!"

Good night.

What time is it when it gets dark out?

Bed time.