Darkness jokes
Kid: "Hey dad, what's dark humor?"
Dad: "Go walk up to that homeless guy and throw a rock at him."
Kid: "But dad, I don't have any legs or arms."
Dad: "Exactly, son."
Where was Moses when the lights went out? - In the dark!
My friend’s mother was never a font of sympathy, but always the one to see beyond the darkness.
Upon learning about her daughter’s cancer diagnosis she said, “Well honey, at least you’ll lose some weight!”
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends how hard you throw them.
Why can't Sally swing?
Because she has no arms.
Knock knock, "Who's there?", not Sally.
Where did Sally go when the bombs dropped?
Everywhere.
Dark Humor is like a child with cancer. It never gets old.
What is the difference between a kid with cancer and dark humor?
Dark humor never dies!
What's yellow and can't swim? A bus full of kids.
Dark humor jokes about orphans are funny because no parents are gonna be told.
Kid asks, "What is dark humor?" Me *points*, "See that guy across the street..." Kid: "I can't... I'm blind." Me: "Exactly."
Why do orphans get offended by dark humor?
It doesn’t hit home.
Warning, this is dark.
How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch? Give 'em a Sandy Hook.
An Englishman, a Frenchman, a ravishing blonde, and an old lady are sharing a compartment on a train as it winds its way through the Alps. Every now and then the train passes through a tunnel, during which time the compartment is plunged into complete darkness. On one such occasion, a ringing slap is heard, and as the train passes back into daylight, the Frenchman is rubbing his sore, red cheek.
The old lady thinks, "I bet that dirty Frenchman fondled the blonde, and she struck the pervert."
The blonde thinks, "I bet that filthy Frenchman was looking to grope me in the dark, mistook the old lady for me, and she slapped him."
The Frenchman thinks, "I bet that perfidious Englishman touched up the blonde in the dark, and she slapped me by mistake."
The Englishman thinks, "I can't wait for another tunnel so I can slap that French twat again."
How many Microsoft programmers does it take to change a light bulb? - None, they declare darkness to be the new standard.
What do you call a white girl that can run faster than her brothers?
The redneck virgin.
Q: Give a man a day of therapy, he'll be sad for then and on.
A: Give a man a noose, he'll be sad for the rest of his life.
So an orphan was crying in a corner in the dark. Then a man came over and asked, "Why are you crying?"
Then said, "Do you want me to get your parents?"
What does a man with no arms or legs do on Halloween?
Nothing.
For 15 cents a day, you can feed an African child. They eat spare change, I guess.
Why can't Helen Keller drive?
Because she's a woman.